All Posts (34)

Sort by
Hello Team,
Just in!!! Check your email, you should have this message also.
 
Please join our Facebook group to also stay updated!!
 
 
Micore Intl is "in it to win it"  stay connected
 
 
Have a Great Weekend!!
 
Juniques
more info at
Start your own Hair Business for $19.95

Hello and good Friday to you Micoreans!

As you know today is payday for most people, and those of you who earned commission from Micore today have already been paid. Congratulations! But I am on a mission to make sure that ALL of you get paid in Micore!

So today we have sharpened our pencils and have lowered the price of the Caviar Collection hair! We have reduced Caviar Platinum by $20 a bundle, so now a bundle of Platinum Natural Straight to Wavy retails for $160, and at the current 30% member discount your costs is $112!

 

A more popular size 16 inch now retails for $220 a bundle and at the current member discount of 30% your cost is $154.

I don't know who thinks that our platinum hair is way too expensive unless they are shopping at the corner beauty supply store! Other premier brands like Indique, PerfectLocks, etc….cost more than that!

 

And their hair may have fancy (throw away) packaging but it has NO warranty and, although good hair, does not compare to our Caviar Platinum!

We reduced Caviar Gold by $10 per bundle, so a 10 inch bundle of Natural Straight Gold now retails for $120, and at the Member discount of 25%, your price is $90! And more popular size 16" now retails for $165, with the member price of $123.75!!

In other news, in an effort to streamline our inventory we have temporarily removed Caviar Gold Steam Curl, thereby reducing the Caviar Gold collection to Natural Straight and Natural Wavy.

In addition we have removed one of the five lines of IndiSylk, so we eliminated IndiSylk Natural Straight Wavy. This now gives us two lines of Platinum hair, two lines of Gold hair, and four lines of IndiSylk. (We eliminated the least purchased items)

As you know the current Member discount on products is 25%, and 30% on Platinum hair, however as of July 5th or sooner we will be launching our new and improved Micore back office system!

This means the New Compensation Plan will go live, which will certainly put more money in your pocket, but as a result the Member discount will be reduced to 20% on all hair extensions.

Take advantage of this discount now while you can! We have a good stock of Platinum hair so now is the time to buy! For IndiSylk or Gold orders, even if we are temporarily out of stock get your orders in now while the discount is deeper!

Remember the special promotion guys: any Active Consultant with four personally sponsored consultants below them on the day we go live in the new back office system will be auto qualified as a Silver Consultant! This is a big deal guys!

When the new system launches we will offer one hair product pack and two hair growth product packs. However we are looking into offering a special enrollment package that will include a few select products as well as the Zebra Sample Kit, which will help you make upfront commission when enrolling a new consultant. (Which you will also be earning from Product Pack sales as well for new enrollments)

So with that said I hope that you have a fantastic weekend, and also trust that if you are currently In-Active....but were ever a believer in Micore International, and became frustrated with us for any reason, then believe me when I say that now is the time to get excited about your future and the future of Micore International! RE-ACTIVATE NOW and get ready for Micore TWO!!!!!

Hope to see you on the Saturday morning CEO conference call tomorrow at 10:30 AM!

832 551 5558   101455#

To your success,

Derrick Alexander, CEO

P.S. The prices are being adjusted today but may not be live right NOW...but I have to leave the office and wanted to email you now!

Read more…

What Type of Man Best "Fits" You? - Part 1

As a relationship coach, I have the privilege of meeting a variety of people. And, while my client base is mostly women; I talk to men from all walks of life as well. The average everyday man to the mega rich; plus, living in S. FL also offers me an international selection of guys to talk to. 

I love it because, I have such a great deal of respect for men. I notice men everyday in my travels and day to day activities. In the morning as I am driving to the store. I notice men waiting on street corners with coolers containing their lunch in work clothes and steel toe work boots waiting for their ride to pick them up as they head to work a hot and dirty job that most people would never consider because it pays so little for such tedious labor. It may not be the best job, but these men show up every day rain or shine.

Then, continuing with my day, I walk into my favorite Starbucks and in line ahead of me are the "Money Men". The men who spend their days in air conditioned offices working with millions; sometimes billions of dollars worth of financial transactions. They are dressed in their designer suits or other well-groomed and appropriate attire that shows their status as high-powered movers and shakers. They are talking about today’s business, golf, or where they will meet for dinner and drinks after work. 

The contrast is extreme, but underneath it all. These men are the same. Their dreams and goals are to be happy, to love and be loved. They want to be appreciated and respected by the woman they love and their children (if applicable) or if single they long for the love and companionship of a woman who understands that he goes to work every day to be the best man he can be for her. A good woman is the inspiration for most men's achievements.

I watch this process day in and day out and as I listen to women complain about the lack of available good men or the disengaged behavior of their current men. I have to sit back and think; do we even know what a good man is? 

I hear the sincere heartache from both men and women. The pressure they feel to live up to standards that may or may not be viable for who they are at the moment; not feeing appreciated for doing the best they know how to do, right now. Women are ready to discard men because, they seem to lack ambition or are not providing them with the lifestyle they want... right now. Men are ready to walk away from women because, they feel they are unable to be their woman's champion.

It may be true or their lives may be at the beginning of a new positive personal growth cycle, but the frustration of wanting more... Right now... sometimes keeps us from enjoying what and who we currently have. It is perfectly natural to desire more out of life, but we need to be grateful for what we currently have. Once we are; we will be spiritually aligned to receive more and improve our life and relationships.

At times I feel like the media has created a level of discontent in some women. It causes these women to wish for a lifestyle that: 

  • Is inappropriate for her and her true life goals. 
  • Creates discontent and impatience; causing her to lose sight of the ways her life is already improving.
  • Compels her to pursue a man or men; she is not prepared to create and maintain a relationship (life ambitions, money mindset, etc. may not match up) 

Maybe, a woman has a diamond in the rough at home; who with her loving support and belief in his dreams will become the next major player in business or his chosen field. Many successful men began their careers from humble beginnings. It has taken them years to acquire the success they currently enjoy and many of these men have enjoyed the loving support of a woman who knows him and has been with him from his early days.

Professional athletes seem to be a good example of this behavior. A good portion of them, if involved in a staple relationship, are usually with a high school or college sweetheart. Shared values and mindset are more relevant than most people realize. This is not exclusive to professional sports. If you look at some of the most successful men; you will notice the happiest ones are with a woman who shares their:

  • Money mindset
  • Personal interests
  • And general values

Keep this in mind when searching for your next romantic partner. If you are currently in a long-term relationship; you may need to do some soul-searching to see if you the 2 of you began your life together with mutual basic needs. If not, then what was the attraction and where are you now in regards to your life plans; separately and together. 

The goal of this article is to get you to think about you and your mate. Are a good fit? Or if you are single; to really think about what you desire in a relationship, who you are as a woman, and the qualities you have to attract this man to you.

In part 2; I will break it down and offer you some useful tips to point you in the right direction to personal happiness in your love relationship whether you are single or in a relationship.

Remember, life is constantly changing. We grow into people with different and new desires along the way. Our love lives can be one of our greatest joys or biggest heartaches. Take this time to look at men or your man with "new" eyes. You may be pleasantly surprised by what you "see".

Wishing you much love and unlimited joy,

Cyndi Harris, HP

Relationship Solutions Coach, Author, and Joyologist

www.undeniablyirresistible.com

Read more…

Does Eating Rigt=Weight Loss?

Does Eating Right = Weight Loss?



weight+loss+dinners.jpg






Yes it does.  But the only catch is, knowing what eating right is.  And trust me it is not what we have been taught.  Such things, as soy, pork, nuts, sport drinks, diet sodas, low calories foods, and fat free foods, are not the foods and drinks for eating right.  Your body, as I have stated before, is not made of chemicals, preservatives, artificial colors and flavorings, these things should be avoided. I read the status of a young woman on facebook several weeks ago.  Saying that she eats right, but still can't lose weight.  And she mentioned how frustrating it was for her to try so hard and still not be able to lose weight.  Well I wanted to make a comment, but I opted to write an article instead.  Because I realized that it was more than just this young woman out there having this problem.  As the saying goes, it is not your fault, but it is your problem.  And unfortunately a lot of us fit in this category of problems, problems, problems.  When you are unable to fix a problem, it means that you have reached the limit of your knowledge in that area.  And it is up to you to seek and find the solution to your problem(s).  Running into this invisible wall on your weight loss journey, can really take the wind out of your sail.  Doubt, frustion, the loss of will-power are fast eroding the core of your desire.   It makes you question yourself...why is it not, working?  It's not working, because there are food items in your diet that does not allow you to lose weight.  And if you are extremely over weight you may be exercising, when you should be stretching.  Whole foods, such as fruits, vegetables, plenty of good water, coconut water, fish, and chicken,


XL-fruits-veggies1.jpg


minus the sugars, breads, alcoholic drinks, smoking, potatoes, and hard to digest meats, is the only way that the weight will began to shed.  Despite popular belief, you can't lose weight eating what you want.  There has to be a letting go, a cutting lose, never to return again of certain items, and foods from your life.  You should never try to obtain weight loss by taking chemicals.  Once you stop taking the chemicals the weight will return with an attitude, meaning more of it and quickly.  You have to change those habits, and those foods.  So, the young woman's problem is still with what she is eating and her exercising program.

The difference between exercising and stretching, is that exercising is mostly for cardio, and stretching is for toning, improving circulation of blood through all organs of the body, strength building of your core, and rapid weight loss.


Lose+Weight+Pic.jpg



 



The next time that you are comfronted with a problem.  Just seek more information in the area, and keep reaching for success.  Remember, success is not on a earthly plane.  You have to reach up to touch the stars.

Read more articles like this:  B-Magazine

Read more…

Building a brand is all about consistency. Your customers expect to have the same (or darn close to the same) experience whenever they come in contact with your brand.  After all, consistency leads to reliability and trust.

Since I've been doing a lot with visual maps these days, I've really gotten into studying how visual schemes impact your brand.  Here are a few tips that might help you.

Design Schemes and Associations

Think about this - what if you bought one of those red cola cans at a convenience store only to find when you drank it, something orange came out of the can.  That's pretty crazy, right?  You'd probably storm back into the store and confront the cashier at the counter with your red can.  The experience would make you second guess ever buying another from that store, or possibly, ever again.

In fact, that actually happened...sorta. Remember when they came out with clear cola?  It crashed and burned badly...why? Because we expect cola to be dark brown.  And when a very popular condiment maker came out with green ketchup, it ended up making appearances as a collectible on eBay, not on kitchen tables.

Something very similar happens with brands online.  Certain colors and design schemes are associated with certain products. If the product has the wrong color or design, it's off-putting to potential customers.

An important part of creating a consistent brand image is to choose a visual scheme that will always be associated with your name or your company’s name.

Visual Brand Soda

Your Visual Brand Language

To create a design and color scheme for your brand, you need to create a visual brand language, or VBL.

So what's that? A VBL incorporates design elements such as shape, color, materials, finish, typography and composition. All of these items together should work smoothly to communicate your company's values and personality.

For a good example, take BMW's front grill. When you see it on an advertisement or website, you automatically think of BMW and all the qualities associated with this luxury car designer. This distinct design feature is used as a visual marketing tool by the company to trigger feelings and associations in the minds of its target market.

An important key to creating a VBL is to remember that it isn't static, but something can be changed and used in different ways.

Think about Google's logo - basic letters on a clean white background. During different times of year or during promotions,  incremental changes are made to this basic design theme. Your VBL can be something flexible as well.

Visuals for Your Niche

Your own images need to create a brand personality that fits with your niche. Think about your target market and what they like. Consider your products and look at how other companies in your expert niche create their brand personality.

For example, some niches tend to showcase stark, hard line visuals, while others use soft, curvy lines. Each image a company uses fits with its personality to create a sense of consistency across all of its marketing and content creation.

Your Brand's Logo

The single most important visual element is your logo.  Recently, I went to my friends over at Logo Nerds to come up with a new design for me.  I knew the one I had was not fitting well with my niche and I wanted it to make a stronger connection with my brand.

To create a logo, you need to go back to your brand's unique selling proposition. What is your brand's promise and personality? These should be communicated through your brand's logo. Your logo should be based on this foundation and it should harmonize well with your other design elements.

The best practice when designing a logo is to start by choosing a primary and secondary color. The primary color is for your symbol, icon, or lettering. The secondary color is for the background. Take advantage of color meanings and associations when choosing colors.

The Importance of Visual Branding

A common business mistake is to bring in outside visual experts as an afterthought rather than a central part of your business's initial planning.  Remember when I mentioned redesigning my logo?  I have seen people make the mistake of trying to design their own, but that sometimes doesn't send a clear message about who you are and your professionalism.

Here's another resource for you.  Pam Wilson has an amazing blog that teaches a lot about visual branding.  Be sure to check out her Big Brand System here for great tips.

Remember - your brand's visual plan is just as important as your unique selling proposition or your products: it's part of your company's basic image and it can help you communicate clearly about who you are and what you do for your target market.

 

WANT TO RE-POST THIS ARTICLE ON YOUR BLOG OR USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, E-NEWSLETTER OR WEB SITE?

You may, as long as you include this complete blurb with it...

About the Author: Tanya Smith is a creative online business strategist and coach specializing in showing independent service providers how to simplify, save time & stand out with simple strategies that engage more quality leads and clients. Her company Be Promotable provides fresh actionable strategies and virtual resources to promote business owners as power players in their market. Get free tools to simplify and stand out online at: www.tanyasmithonline.com

Read more…

Nail Technicians Needed!!

The Spa Expectations Corporation is in need of one or two Nail techs for a job in the Bronx (NY) Monday, June 10th,  morning from 10am - 11:30am for seniors.  Nail techs will provide basic manicures.

Nail Technician much have own supplies.   Compensation $60.  Will be working with Wellcare, Inc and The Spa Expectations Corporation team.

Please email Expectationsspa@Aol.com if interested for additional details or call or text

646-206-9499.

 

Also, seeks Nail technicians to contract for upcoming events and parties.  Please email us along with your resume or interests in working with us - Expectationsspa@Aol.com.

 

Thank you

 

http://www.thespaexpectationscorporation.org

Read more…

10744096275?profile=originalSee Where You Are Going

One of the most relied upon of the five senses is sight. Sight on a basic level is the ability to see with your physical eyes. But if you dig deeper the ability to see includes creating a mental picture; a visualization. Familiar with the term “mind’s eye”? This term refers to the human ability for visualization, which is experiencing visual mental imagery. Basically, the ability to “see” with your mind. Helen Keller said, “The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but, no vision.”

From this place of seeing you can begin to jump start your life. Use your “mind’s eye” to see yourself in the future. Where are you? Are you living the life you dreamed of living? Are you experiencing success in all areas of your life? Do you have balance? Say to yourself, “I see you in the future and you look much better than you look right now!”

Visualize the life you want and deserve to live. Harness what you see to help create the path to get from where you are to where you want to be. Use vision to see where you are going.

Pursue Your Passion

Dare to create a vision for your life? Tap into the creativity embedded within you to reach your destined place of purpose. Have you taken the steps necessary to find your purpose? That very thing you are passionate about could be the spark you need. 

I was inspired to become a life coach because I encountered individuals who have shared with me that they don’t know their life’s mission. They didn’t know why they are on this earth at this appointed time and in space. Some stated they have no desire to invest their time, resources or energy to finding their purpose, maximizing their potential and igniting the passion within. I hope you are not at this place in your life; however, if you are then you are reading this at the right time.

Now is the time for you to invest in you. You may have spent years, an enormous amount of resources or endless hours working toward something that is not germane to your life’s call. But take the time to think about that thing in your life which makes you sing. That thing you begin to talk about to the point where people can see the twinkle in your eye and the glow in your countenance. Discover, unleash and pursue your passion.

Act on Your Goals

Take a close look at the word “goal”.  The first two letters make up the word “go”. Go, to move on a course, proceed or to take a certain course. It is just that simple. Goals are not as complicated as we make them out to be. For example, your goal is the bigger picture. For this example our goal or bigger picture is to go food shopping. There are a number of “tasks” we must complete in order to reach this goal. The basic tasks include preparation, going outside, getting into the car, putting the car in gear and “going”.

An effective way to help reach your goals is to break the bigger goal down into a series of tasks. With this in mind, you may only want to tackle two to three goals at one time. Why? Because when you list out the tasks associated with each goal the list can become pretty long. Begin small, be persistent and consistent.

Rev Up Your Engine

In thinking about revving an engine, car racing came to mind. In preparation for a high speed motor race revving the engine prepares the car for optimum performance. To get your car warmed up for the race ahead.

This is certainly a principle you can apply to your life. Revving your personal engine is a great way to prepare yourself for the race head. Life is often viewed as a race. It takes many components for you to not only get in the race, but to sustain it with speed, persistence, consistency and accuracy. You are the driver and the car you have been given is called life. One of the keys to life is learning to drive and navigate with wise efficiency.

One of the ways to “rev up your engine” is to create positive affirmations which are consistent with the way you see your life in the future. They should be positive and written in present tense. View your future with your “mind’s eye”.

Kick Start Your Life

To “kick start” your life is just another way to say “jump start”. It is time to restart fresh and re-energize your life. Little to no progress can be made if you are stuck in life with no “spark” to help provide the kick start you need.

In the movie Inception, “the kick” was necessary to awaken a dreaming individual to get them from one level to another. Sometimes in order to get to our next level in life with need a kick. It is time to make room for new experiences by removing thoughts, ideas and concepts that are not helping you to get to your new level in life. What may have worked in the past may not work for your future.

Kick start your life by connecting with the right people, changing the way you see your life, pursuing your passion and getting the tools and resources you need to jump start your life.

You can receive more inspiration of awesomeness from my weekly podcast show, Awesome Living with Cheryl Pullins.

Read more…

3 Things Great Clients Know

Stay up to date with First & Fifteen...

What Great Clients Know...

I did a lot of freelance consoling during May, mainly because some folk are doing my peeps dirty, but I'm going to try and fix that.  Here’s 3 things great clients know:

overglasses.jpgFreelancers do work for you, not work for you - they set their hours, rates, terms and methods. Employees do the job for you for the price you set, on your terms, how you want it done and when you want it done. Employees also come with salary and benefits expenses and it is illegal to pay them less than minimum wage. See the difference?
Message: Respect the freelancer’s mode of operation.
Real life: You gotta pay the cost to be the boss

Be aware of the verbal contracts you create. Stating that you will engage a freelancer’s services and pay deposit on a certain day/date is a verbal contract and can be held up in a court of law. Most freelancers don’t pursue it, but it is a viable option.  And sure, circumstances change, things come up, but without communication, you could be cited for breach of contract. Not to mention it can screw up a schedule and/or a budget. The freelancer with a lawyer on retainer that decides to sue for breach of contract could receive the amount of your project PLUS lost income if they could have someone in your spot.
Message: If your situation changes let the freelancer know.
Real life: it’s like the cancellation fee your doctor’s office charges if you cancel less than 24 hours in advance.

You get what you pay for. Let’s leave quality out of it for a minute and talk solely in terms of deliverables. I say this often, but when you change the scope of your project, you increase the cost and/or length of time.
Message: If your budget doesn’t allow for the high end package, either save up, make adjustments to your wants list OR invest the time into learning how to do it yourself.
Real life: dollar menu items aren’t on the value meal list

Quickies:


  • Failure to read and/or comprehend your service contract does not absolve you from your obligation to pay.

  • Your fee is for the product or service. Whether or not you use it is on you.

  • Treat your freelancer how you want to be treated in your own biz/on your job.

  • Your org may be non-profit, but most times the freelancer is not.

  • Freelancers work freely. For a fee. © 2009-2013 Auntee Rik

 

Hopefully this list gives you some insight or some confidence that you’re a great client. Happy June!

Until next time,

mr_aqua.png

Disclaimer: These points only take into account those freelancers that handle their biz. If you’re dealing with anyone that does not, switch providers.
 

Stay up to date with First & Fifteen...

Read more…

Juniques explains feeder/cycler program

Rickey Johnson, Owner of Juniques. ( www.juniques.ws) shares how cycler/feeder program can benefit anyone who need to generate income producing assets and had limited funds.

Cyclers/ Feeder  programs are not a new concept.  It is a proven income generating "vehicle".

Like any "vehicle" you will want to "test drive" it before you purchase.

Fortunately, The Ultimate Cycler is a low cost one time purchase program, that in addition to help you generate income, it also provides great lead generating software and attractive downloadable business apps.

Read more…

Discovering your voice – part two/PQ

 

Have you been taking good care of your body, your mind, your heart, and your spirit lately? As promised, I would like to continue my study on The 8th Habit and the 4 Intelligences. Developing our Physical IntelligencePQ, Mental Intelligence – IQ, Emotional Intelligence – EQ, and Spiritual Intelligence – SQ will "instill in us a quiet confidence, internal strength and security, the ability to be simultaneously courageous and considerate and personal moral authority." (the principled use of our freedom and power to choose)

  

Although, developing and using our PQ seems pretty common, the CDC estimates that more than 1/3 of U.S. adults (35.7%) and approximately 17% (or 12.5 million) of children and adolescents aged 2-19 years are obese. These numbers are staggering! Perhaps it has to do with an undeveloped or unused PQ birth-gift. There are three essential ways to develop your PQ: wise nutrition, consistent balanced exercise, and proper rest, relaxation, stress management, and prevention thinking.

 

Wise nutrition 

Eating healthy starts when we create menus and choose foods that contain mostly whole grains, vegetables, fruits, beans, leaner meats and fish as part of our diet. Vegetarians and other non-meat eaters will disagree with eating any meat as part of wise nutrition, and some non-meat eaters believe that anything with eyes or a face should not to be consumed by the body. Our purpose here is not to debate what  people eat, but to recognize that eating for nutrition is important.  Although, the body uses fat to store and provide energy and to carry vitamins throughout the body, a regular intake of fast and processed foods, high in saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol, is asking for PQ trouble.  When we drink plenty of water and fast from time-to-time we give our digestive system a chance to recuperate from improper feeding. Mr. Covey believes “that when you properly control your appetites, your ability to control your passions and to purify your desires increases. It gives you a real feeling of humility and enables you to gain greater perspective about what is really important in life.”

  

Consistent balanced exercise

Our second way to develop PQ,  is physical activity. Finding the time to exercise can be a challenge for many.  I have found that setting S.M.A.R.T. exercise goals works wonders, especially, when it's an exercise of my choosing and on my own terms. My S.M.A.R.T goal for the coming month is to dance for 10-15 minutes every morning, take a 10-15 minute walk every afternoon (with ankle weights), and jump rope 5-10 minutes in the evening, 4 days a week. It’s specific, measurable, attainable/realistic and timely. What is your exercise routine? Regular exercise builds up your cardiovascular strength, flexibility and increases your quality of life and life expectancy. Being consistent and balancing exercise in strength training, cardio, and toning will impact your PQ significantly.

 

Proper rest, relaxation, stress management and prevention thinking

Maintaining the body for optimum performance is the third way to develop our PQ. As you know, when we do not get the proper amount of rest and relaxation, our bodies begin to take a toll. In order to relieve our body of this taxation, we must be aware of two types of stress: “distress that comes from hating your work, resenting the multiplied pressures of life, and feeling you are a victim, and eustress that comes from the positive tension between where we are now and where we want to go—some meaningful goal or project or cause that really turns us on and taps into our talents and passion; in short, our voice.” When we operate in a distressed state, we bring more suffering and/or anguish into our lives, however, when we operate from a “eustress management” state, our immune system, longevity and enjoyment increases, strengthens us and enlarges our capacity.

 

Many of the diseases that affect us today can be prevented by the choices we make. Remember, between stimulus and response there is a space, and in that space we make our choice. It is natural to get off track from time to time, however, as we listen to our body, it will guide and help us get back on track.

 

Stay tuned for part three - Developing your Mental Intelligence - IQ.

 

The recommended readings for this week are Old School New Body Click Here!  The Acid Alkaline Balanced Diet

Click Here! and Stress? Laugh At It! Click Here!

 

Until next time stay beamed up!

Monica

Read more…

Time to Forgive #16

 It’s time to Let Go
Completely
From our thoughts and our heart
It’s time to Let Go
Completely
 So we can move forward
To forgive someone is sometimes easier said than done. 
What is it to forgive someone?  I have been hurt physically & emotionally.  It will take a lot for me to get over all the hurt that I had to endure and yet I must find a way to forgive.  It is very easy to see or feel how much someone hurts us, however we may not always see or feel how much we also have hurt others.  Maybe if we could understand where our hurt comes from, it would be easier to forgive.  If we could find a way to let go completely we would be able to move forward. 
My husband and I didn’t communicate to each other and that caused us both to jump to conclusions based on our past.  We didn’t love ourselves enough to be honest about our own hearts and feelings.  We didn’t allow ourselves to become one because we both held on to our past hurt so much.  By holding onto those past hurts we let ourselves experience the hurt over and over again instead of allowing us to heal together.  We were our own worst enemies.  We knew we had something special because God brought us together to help each other.  We knew that we had gone through the same things and therefore should be able to understand each other.  We should have been able to help each other and yet we let our own feelings cause us the pain we tried so hard to avoid.    My husband and I experienced a selfish -kind of hurt.  I say that because we were too concerned about ourselves rather than being concerned about each other.  This selfish hurt caused us to not let go and therefore, we could not move forward.  The sad thing about it is that we caused our own problems by being selfish.  He did not cause my hurt and I did not cause his hurt, we were both responsible for our own hurt. 
How could we ever forgive each other if we were not willing to let go of the hurt we had built up inside ourselves?  In order to forgive others we must first look in the mirror and see who we are.  Are we holding onto hurt feelings and holding someone else responsible for our feelings?    Everyone has a past and our past makes us who we are, however our past is just that…”our past”…it is not our future.  I had to look inside myself to find what drives the force of forgiveness for me personally. I had to look within myself to find the peace in my heart that allowed me to forgive.  My life consisted of many experiences which I held on to.  Some of those experiences were good and some were bad.  I realized that by holding on to those experiences, they had a part in developing me as a person.  I choose how to categorize each experience and how to let each experience shape my life.  Because, we as humans, tend to dwell on the bad or negative, I allowed those bad and negative experiences to control my inner self.  I don't think we realize when we do this.  I don't think we even realize that it is our choice how we live. We are in control of our self no one else can control what is in us...only we have that control.  I had to realize this to understand how to forgive.  My husband was not responsible for the feelings I had.  Those feelings were in me long before I even met him.  My feelings of insecurity, my feelings of being unloved, my feelings of having no self esteem were my choices.  It was my choice to allow my feelings to be confirmed by his words or actions.  It was my choice to allow him to affect my life in a negative way.  What happened to me...was not me.  I had always tried to live my life in a positive way.  One of the main beliefs I lived by was that everything in life is a gift from God.  Everything is an experience that God has allowed us to have.  You do not know the reason, however at the very base we were given each experience to learn from and possibly to use to help someone else in the future who may also go through the same experience.  I lost this belief, because I choose to.  I was not strong enough within myself to realize what I was allowing to happen.  I had to look within myself to be able to forgive myself enough to let go of the choices I kept buried in my heart.  I had to let go of the bad choices I was allowing to control my life and my feelings.  I had to accept that my choices are mine...no one else's.  To understand the unique person that God made me to be, allowed me to not only accept myself as a beautiful creation of God, I was also able to forgive myself and accept my own choices.  By accepting my self, I can accept that my husband is his own person also....an equally beautiful creation of God who was allowed his own unique choices (good or bad).  In realizing this, I realized that my husband is responsible for his own choices and I don't have to allow his choice to affect me in a negative way.  The story I have expressed was from my heart, however it is not a true story in that it was not only my heart that was involved.  My husband went through his own types of pains and hurts.  My husband was also a victim of my choices.  My husband deserves the right to be who God created him to be without judgment or blame from me or anyone else.  Just as I became the person I became, he also became the person he became due to his past and the very hard and unique challenges he had to experience.  No one can say that either he; nor I was more or less to blame... we are who we are because God made us this way.  God has a reason for each of us, that is why he created us each as a unique individual.  I am blessed and able to accept and love myself and my husband as the unique and blessed people that God has created us to be.  I am a perfect creation of God and so is my husband; that is the reason God brought us together… for each other.  For me to forgive was to find peace within myself through Christ.  To forgive I had to replace the hurt in my heart with Love.
I forgive because I accept the blessings God has given us as individuals.
Maybe to forgive others
means
to be able to forgive ourselves;
and now in front of the world...
I proclaim
To my Husband.....
Donell,
I forgive you!
Can you forgive me?

Read more…

Blog Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives