Why do men cheat? I asked myself that question plenty of times. I used to think it was because the woman didnt wash his clothes good enough, cook his food right, or sex him the best. If you think about it, the best is his wife. Flaws and all
Being a women this day and age takes alot of work. You have to keep yourself up and do the house work, maintain your job and social status and love your man.
Loving your man can be hard when you are giving your all to the faith of the union that the marriage was supposed to stand on.
Why do we as women put up with so much drama. Is it because we refuse to let go of the hope that he can change? Or do we settle for a man who will not do right by us because we want to have someone around?
Not to let women go without fault, some women allow men to make them the mistress and dont realize that she is a victim but refuses to see the light.
If you are the woman who is cheating, ask yourself why? People will always find an excuse and the time to cheat. If it is available it is possible.
So ladies and gentlemen tell me, why do men cheat? and why do we as women put up with it?
Hello and thanks for the response. There are a few things that we agree on but others that we don't . We do feel that a woman should take care of herself in order to keep her man. You should check out or website under a womans upkeep at www.soabovemistress1.com . We feel that You should always look your best and make sure that your man can be proud that you are on his arm. However if a woman lets her self go...You said "should he cheat? No. Is it understandable? Yes". We say NO. Men let themselves go all the time. If my husband gains 50lbs is it ok for me to step out on him? Is it understandable? NO! Men love to find a reason to blame women for what they are doing wrong. I am not responsible for HIS actions. If my husband cheats does that give me the right to do the same? Some people would say that it would be "understanable" but no matter what the reason, it's wrong. A man who cheats is selfish. Do we believe that all men that cheat are DOGS? No. People make mistakes but if the he cheats and then points the figure, what is there stopping him from doing it again? And if he does it again, can we then call him a DOG? What about the woman who is doing everything at home and her man still steps out? She looks great, the house is always clean, she's great in bed. It happens all the time. Both parties are responsible for keeping a realtionship together but one person can break it apart.
Men cheat because they want to - they have always had the free pass which is evident by our language. We just pass it off as men being men. Well, I think it's wrong. We should all be held accountable for our actions and cheating should be considered unacceptable by all. Men view women through sexual, lust filled eyes. It's like going to a garden filled with beautiful flowers and wanting to have them all.
Women should not be blamed for cheating spouses. There are those women who have remained faithful, committed and attentive to the needs of their men and yet he cheats. I was appalled recently when I watched an interview with a psychologist who was responding to the Governor of New York's sexual liaisons with prostitutes and she immediately focused on his wife and how responsible the wife is for ensuring that her man does not stray. We have to wake up and really stop being so submissive in our thoughts as it relates to men. They are adults who cannot be controlled just as much as we do not want to be controlled. We want to be respected as we should and it will be a matter of reciprocating the respect to others.
Women put up with it for various reasons - lack of confidence in themselves (may feel no one else will love them), they may feel like they have invested too much of themselves into the relationship to just walk away, they may have financial dependencies, not wanting to feel like a failure before their family, friends and acquaintances, wanting to provide their children with a two parent home, etc.
In my opinion, cheating is a hard blow. It hurts and it eats away at the trust. When you lose trust you lose everything else - making it hard to regain the same feeling you had before. It's tough and we should not stand for it...............
We do. You can check out our website under the home tab there are 10 sections. In section 10 there are the signs of a cheating spouse. www.soabovemistress1.com
Let's start back in the day if you know during the European times you were a social outcast if you didn't have a mistress. It was part of life and generation to generation women were supposed accept it. And for the most part they did. Women don't have to accept it some they just do. I've heard women say."Just as long he paid the bills I don't care what he does." That statement alone supposed to keep down the drama. But any woman who says is really fooling themselves. Everyone wants to know that if they are being faithful to their spouse then they expect the same.
Now I think about the difference between a husband cheating and a boyfriend cheating. A husband cheats there is a lot at stake. But when a boyfriend cheats they can leave with a fight because they are just a boyfriend. This is just the way I see it. If my husband cheated on me, I think I would be hurt for a little while. I don't believe in fighting and beating up the woman that's immature and too much drama. Others perfer the later. You will have to know me in order to understand why I would'nt go crazy. I will allow him to explain himself then he would have to leave or I will leave. Some things can be worked out and some things can't now if you decide to keep him which is fine, remember you will have problems with trust in the relationship or you as the woman would to get revenge so you start a outside relationship which really causes more drama. Some men don't take a man cheating with his wife or girlfriend too lightly. Why I don't know.
I believe that there is a big diff between a boyfriend cheating and a husband cheating. Both hurt but they are in no way the same thing (in my eyes). I had a ex boyfriend tell me that you were either married or single. When you fill out an application it never has the option of "in a relationship". That stuck in my head for all of these years. If a boyfriend cheats I think it is a lot easier to walk away. When you are married there is so much to take into consideration but the loss of trust makes it hard to rebuild any relationship.
On the subject of the other woman, I do not believe in fighting a woman for a man. When I say "fighting" I am talking about in all ways not just a physical fight. However I think that when someone disrespects you to your face that is a whole other story. Now the "fight" is about you and her and not her and your man. We have a situration with a mistress that we talk about in our book. The reason that we put her "on blast" (our way of fighting back ) was because she showed us the worst kind of disrespect. She slept with both of our husbands. She called me and told me that she didnt care that he was married and that she was going to do what she wanted with him. She said very hurtful things. She spread lies and the list goes on. For me she crossed the line.
As for women getting revenge, I agree with you that it causes to much drama. I think the best revenge is being able to look at your spouse and say "i was always faithful". I love that my husband can not point the finger. I think it gives me power and the upper hand.
Thanks for the response!
Oh ok cool i just didnt want it to be a negative thing. Sorry for misunderstanding you. well we are all women and i still want you and everyone to be so above mistress.
i hear where you are coming from. this isnt an argument babe sorry if you are taking this wrong. we want healthy discussions. cheating isnt good no matter what partner does it. to tell you the truth no reason justifies cheating in my book. it has nothing to do with your weight. if a man or woman decide to cheat for any reason good or bad it takes two people. when you have a relationship gone bad you cant point the blame on one person, that part i do agree with you. it takes two people to make it work. if things arent right at home and you step out, that is failure. you should be able to take care of home first. if home isnt happy no matter who made the mistakes at least fi it before you decide to bring in more drama.
Replies
Women should not be blamed for cheating spouses. There are those women who have remained faithful, committed and attentive to the needs of their men and yet he cheats. I was appalled recently when I watched an interview with a psychologist who was responding to the Governor of New York's sexual liaisons with prostitutes and she immediately focused on his wife and how responsible the wife is for ensuring that her man does not stray. We have to wake up and really stop being so submissive in our thoughts as it relates to men. They are adults who cannot be controlled just as much as we do not want to be controlled. We want to be respected as we should and it will be a matter of reciprocating the respect to others.
Women put up with it for various reasons - lack of confidence in themselves (may feel no one else will love them), they may feel like they have invested too much of themselves into the relationship to just walk away, they may have financial dependencies, not wanting to feel like a failure before their family, friends and acquaintances, wanting to provide their children with a two parent home, etc.
In my opinion, cheating is a hard blow. It hurts and it eats away at the trust. When you lose trust you lose everything else - making it hard to regain the same feeling you had before. It's tough and we should not stand for it...............
Now I think about the difference between a husband cheating and a boyfriend cheating. A husband cheats there is a lot at stake. But when a boyfriend cheats they can leave with a fight because they are just a boyfriend. This is just the way I see it. If my husband cheated on me, I think I would be hurt for a little while. I don't believe in fighting and beating up the woman that's immature and too much drama. Others perfer the later. You will have to know me in order to understand why I would'nt go crazy. I will allow him to explain himself then he would have to leave or I will leave. Some things can be worked out and some things can't now if you decide to keep him which is fine, remember you will have problems with trust in the relationship or you as the woman would to get revenge so you start a outside relationship which really causes more drama. Some men don't take a man cheating with his wife or girlfriend too lightly. Why I don't know.
On the subject of the other woman, I do not believe in fighting a woman for a man. When I say "fighting" I am talking about in all ways not just a physical fight. However I think that when someone disrespects you to your face that is a whole other story. Now the "fight" is about you and her and not her and your man. We have a situration with a mistress that we talk about in our book. The reason that we put her "on blast" (our way of fighting back ) was because she showed us the worst kind of disrespect. She slept with both of our husbands. She called me and told me that she didnt care that he was married and that she was going to do what she wanted with him. She said very hurtful things. She spread lies and the list goes on. For me she crossed the line.
As for women getting revenge, I agree with you that it causes to much drama. I think the best revenge is being able to look at your spouse and say "i was always faithful". I love that my husband can not point the finger. I think it gives me power and the upper hand.
Thanks for the response!
Oh ok cool i just didnt want it to be a negative thing. Sorry for misunderstanding you. well we are all women and i still want you and everyone to be so above mistress.