I am the motivator that is what I do, I am the head of the house, the Boss of the family and I am the one every body turns to.
That is just to much to bare, I realized yesterday that I have no friends and my family only looks to me to give them a better life. My faith in myself, people and Life is fading.
I came up with and Idea to have a conference to reconstruct the black family in early 2006 If you type in M.AN.D.I.N.G.O Summit it will show up online, well in June of last year a female Associate of mine stopped calling me and answering my calls I just wrote it off ass female mess you know how girls get.... But I just happen to go to this chick website yesterday and seen her advertising for the 'African American Family Conference' In Philly on May The 10th so I'm reading the details of the conference and what do you know it is 80% of my idea for my summit. She tried to add in grandparents and foster parents but that didn't change anything.
So now I know why she stop speaking to me , she wanted to steal my idea, I'm not mad because it's just a cheap knock off of what I envisioned.
I know that in business you are not suppose to tell the cards in your hand but I was looking for sponsors so I just have to live and learn
I just have to accept that I'm in this world alone {accept my children} and the only people that come into my life just want to use me. Once I grasp hold of that idea then i can be more productive.
So I live and I learn,
Fadia
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Hello My Sister,
Something you mentioned in your first paragraph puzzled me. "You said Faith in yourself" Well I will pray for you, that your faith will be in God the almighty.
Correct me please if I'm wrong, I realize everybody is not at the same place when it comes to religion and I'm not trying to push you toward mine however, most Black Americans do believe that there is a God and He is in control.
Forget about the problem as I heard you say you would and allow God to move you toward your solution. He's Able!
Fadia Ward > Beverly Fisher2007May 9, 2008 at 10:26pm
It doesn't matter if you have faith in 'God' if you don't have faith in yourself the mission will not be fulfilled.
And no I'm not in the same place most people are with religion, my idea of faith is on a different level then the people I come in contact with.
Some times it's hard for me to explain my self, I was shown at the age of 8 that I will fulfill a Prophecy and again at 19 and again at 26 basically he is telling me no matter how far I run or go I still have to do this for him.
My human self does not want anything to do with this mission, my human self is flawed extremely flawed, and after years of telling him to pick someone else I have finally accepted my destiny, but I just don't see how I can accomplish this alone without adaqut funding. So this is where the faith in myself comes in. I know that the answer I'm seeking is right in front of me I just can't see it.
I'm definitely in a spiritual battle within myself. I just want to be alone in the mountains with my kids and a dog in a nice home, I just don't no why I can't have that it's not fare.
Hey Sis,
I just want to take a moment to reply and let you know that not ALL people are out to use you or take advantage of you. Life is hard Sis. And, you WILL run into people who are ill-willed and lack integrity and personal values. That's a fact. However, you sound like a woman who is on a mission. You sound like a woman of purpose. If you have kids, then you ARE and have to be a woman of purpose because you are creating a legacy whether you want to or not.
You can leave a good legacy for your kids or a bad one. You don't want to leave a legacy of distrust, because the only way you will find those relationships that are worth something is by taking a risk. With risks come both the good and the bad, but you can't avoid risks. Some risks are just in your face, 'don't do it.' And others, well, you roll the dice and they come up lucky number 7. But you won't know if you don't roll every now and again. A legacy of distrust is one of isolation, paranoia, constant doubt, and the inability to TRULY develop a social network of people who genuinely care. Chalk your 'used to be friend or associate' up as just that - - 'used to be.' But don't penalize the rest of US, who would like to get to know you, learn from you, be inspired by you, and love on you. And for God's sake, don't imprison your children. Allow them to see a mom who is free and has 'bouncebackability' (made that up, LOL). Pray and put this behind you, but don't let it get in front of you. Your future is still yet to unfold. Don't stifle it by holdingn on to a regret in your past.
Unfortunately the Godliness in me won't allow me to shut down completely, I have moved on from that experience because I know that it will not be done the way Fadia will do it, it's just really frustrating.
I sometimes wish I didn't have to fulfill the prophecy that has been placed on me it's to much it's lonely and i never know who's really about changing the world or just changing their world.
What I am is tired that's it, I would like it if The Most High has this great plan for me if he could just send me my flock so I can accomplish this and get it over with.
But we all no it comes in his time not ours lol....
Replies
Something you mentioned in your first paragraph puzzled me. "You said Faith in yourself" Well I will pray for you, that your faith will be in God the almighty.
Correct me please if I'm wrong, I realize everybody is not at the same place when it comes to religion and I'm not trying to push you toward mine however, most Black Americans do believe that there is a God and He is in control.
Forget about the problem as I heard you say you would and allow God to move you toward your solution. He's Able!
And no I'm not in the same place most people are with religion, my idea of faith is on a different level then the people I come in contact with.
Some times it's hard for me to explain my self, I was shown at the age of 8 that I will fulfill a Prophecy and again at 19 and again at 26 basically he is telling me no matter how far I run or go I still have to do this for him.
My human self does not want anything to do with this mission, my human self is flawed extremely flawed, and after years of telling him to pick someone else I have finally accepted my destiny, but I just don't see how I can accomplish this alone without adaqut funding. So this is where the faith in myself comes in. I know that the answer I'm seeking is right in front of me I just can't see it.
I'm definitely in a spiritual battle within myself. I just want to be alone in the mountains with my kids and a dog in a nice home, I just don't no why I can't have that it's not fare.
SorryAssBabyDaddies.com
I just want to take a moment to reply and let you know that not ALL people are out to use you or take advantage of you. Life is hard Sis. And, you WILL run into people who are ill-willed and lack integrity and personal values. That's a fact. However, you sound like a woman who is on a mission. You sound like a woman of purpose. If you have kids, then you ARE and have to be a woman of purpose because you are creating a legacy whether you want to or not.
You can leave a good legacy for your kids or a bad one. You don't want to leave a legacy of distrust, because the only way you will find those relationships that are worth something is by taking a risk. With risks come both the good and the bad, but you can't avoid risks. Some risks are just in your face, 'don't do it.' And others, well, you roll the dice and they come up lucky number 7. But you won't know if you don't roll every now and again. A legacy of distrust is one of isolation, paranoia, constant doubt, and the inability to TRULY develop a social network of people who genuinely care. Chalk your 'used to be friend or associate' up as just that - - 'used to be.' But don't penalize the rest of US, who would like to get to know you, learn from you, be inspired by you, and love on you. And for God's sake, don't imprison your children. Allow them to see a mom who is free and has 'bouncebackability' (made that up, LOL). Pray and put this behind you, but don't let it get in front of you. Your future is still yet to unfold. Don't stifle it by holdingn on to a regret in your past.
Much Love,
A Sister who Cares....
Unfortunately the Godliness in me won't allow me to shut down completely, I have moved on from that experience because I know that it will not be done the way Fadia will do it, it's just really frustrating.
I sometimes wish I didn't have to fulfill the prophecy that has been placed on me it's to much it's lonely and i never know who's really about changing the world or just changing their world.
What I am is tired that's it, I would like it if The Most High has this great plan for me if he could just send me my flock so I can accomplish this and get it over with.
But we all no it comes in his time not ours lol....
Thank you