Even if you don't feel like the situation was your fault, asking for forgiveness for your part in the argument may be the quickest way to smooth things over and save your relationship. A well-delivered apology can soothe hurt feelings and draw others closer to you. So, how can you express regret in a way that benefits you?
Finding the Right Words
Just saying that you're sorry may be enough if it's sincere. If you've really hurt a person's feelings, though, you might want to say more. How long should your apology be? It should last as long as it takes to communicate sincerity and honesty.
The most important part of any apology is sincerity. Others can tell when your words are insincere. And an insincere apology usually makes the situation worse.
Express a willingness to accept your part of the blame. Some words you can use are:
• I'm sorry.
• I apologize.
• Please forgive me.
• I know I've wronged you.
• I hate that this has come between us.
• What can I do to make things right?
• Can we talk out our differences?
• Please let me explain.
If you open the conversation this way, you demonstrate that you truly want to make things better. Swallowing your pride and admitting that you've wronged someone is easier than you think. Most will be receptive to your desire to repair the relationship and respond in a way that brings healing to both of you.
Find an Opportune Time to Apologize
The timing of your apology is critical. Take a time when the other person isn't rushed. Even the most careful apology will fall on deaf ears if it is delivered at a time when the other person is hurried and focused on something else.
Ideally, make an appointment. Let them know that you have something important to discuss at their convenience. That way, you're more likely to receive their undivided attention and have better results with your apology.
Be flexible and work around the other person's schedule. Your willingness to be inconvenienced to accommodate the other person's schedule is an important first step in communicating that you are sincere in your apology.
Show that you mean what you say, and follow it up with actions that demonstrate the truthfulness of your words. Actions speak louder than words, and what you do shortly after your apology can do more to heal your relationship than any words you can say.
Hurt feelings are an unfortunate part of the important relationships in your life. Thankfully, a thoughtful apology that considers the other person's viewpoint can heal wounds that are caused by your mistakes. If you follow through with actions that show your sincerity, you stand an excellent chance of success in repairing the relationship and even making it stronger than ever before!
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