I don't necessarily consider myself shy, just quiet. A little reserved at times. Of course, I am talkative with friends and associates I am comfortable with. I would like to become more comfortable speaking to groups and being more assertive. Though I consider myself a true fighter, I am a quiet warrior.The fear of public speaking is common but can be such a hindrance. I love to communicate through the written word, but I understand the importance of being able to convey thoughts, ideas, and my feelings verbally. I am trying to face the discomfort of communicating more verbally.I recently visited a toastmasters meeting, to see if it would be of interest to me. I wanted to know if being a part of this public speaking organization would help me. Well, The people were very nice, a lot went on in an hour. Now as a guest, you are not required to speak but I was asked to make a three minute speech on a question, impromptu. I think not.!!! I screamed Hell no!! In my mind. I declined and they moved on. At the end I was asked to share why I was interested in Toastmasters. I was able to stand up and answer but I was so worried about forgetting to say something I felt was important, it was a trying a few minutes. The entire hour I was sitting there, I kept saying to myself; please don't ask me to talk. I laugh now, but I did not see the humor at the time. I also reflected on negative experiences with speaking. When I was younger, I wanted to act. I was involved in a play or two in elementary school and a presentation in English class in high school. In all the situations, I kept getting yelled at because my voice does not "carry" I was told to learn to project my voice. In every case there were a lot of students and staff just staring at me. It was not a good feeling. My voice has always been light. Even when I yell, it is not very loud.I am such a caring and peaceful person, I listen to everyone's issues and comment when I need to, or just listen and offer support. I don't think the world revolves around me and I care about others, but every once in a while it would be nice if someone heard me, if they could really see me. I am a little odd, I have many interests I read everything and I will try just about anything, it is relaxing to me to learn and experience new things. When I communicate things like, I have taken singing lessons just for the heck of it, or African dance lessons, art therapy, even an auto repair course, no one sees the point. When I finally decide to share different business ideas, people look at me as if I am crazy. So, it is not so easy sometimes to share.I also don't want to keep my poetry and stories to myself anymore because I know when I have allowed others to read them, they are touched by it. I want to be able to read my poetry in public. To market myself and my work. As a future business owner I need to able to sell myself, products and services and I cannot be shy about. I have seen so many people excel not because they were the brightest or had the best ideas, they were talkers. They could talk to anyone about anything and be convincing. They know how to make themselves and whatever they are interested in sound exciting to someone else.Naturally, it is very easy to be assertive, aggressive if necessary, when it comes to my son. I am a real "Mama". I am a different person when it comes to him. Anyway, all that being said, how many others have this issue? You want to share, but it is difficult. Your thoughts and issues are minimized. You may be shy or just unsure of yourself. Maybe you have been rejected too many times, so you don't speak up or ask for help...You have somehow made it ok to be quiet., when it is not.Ms. Quiet Storm
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