lifestyles (2)

Reflecting on the past can work in any relationship whether personal or business when situations which call for a crucial decision come up. If you haven’t had a similar experience, try being positive first. It could save you time, money and effort, and a good friend or business associate. A negative response may cause you to have to start all over and lose something or someone very valuable to your life. The following story is a good example of my theory.

Yesterday I was visiting my boyfriend (yes, I have a boyfriend at my age, but that’s for another discussion), and he said something that “hurt my feelings,” and for a moment I froze. I say “hurt my feelings,” although no one can “hurt” your feelings. They are your feelings and you alone control how you feel. He could only direct my positive or negative response, which I also still control.

Anyway, the super-sensitive, low self-esteem, jealous, ejective Paris pulled her head in like a turtle and began to sulk. That was my first reaction and the old me would have been plotting ways in her head to break away from the relationship. She would have become angry and mean, and probably would have said some rather nasty and unladylike things involving body parts and personality traits.

But thank God I remembered a very similar situation from over 30 yeas ago in which the man wasn’t trying to hurt my feelings. He was sharing a decision he had made and an action he had taken which put me at the front of the line. (Ladies, there’s always a line, whether in fact or in fiction (such as the Playboy Channel). So, being the new me, my response became positive, and worked to draw me closer to him rather than to “throw the baby out with the bath water.”

I would have preferred not to know about his actions, but the fact that he was willing to share them with me let me see that he trusts me enough to tell me something which could have caused a very bad reaction. I appreciated his trust, which deepened my feelings.

If I had not have had that past experience, and recalled it, I would have made a very bad current mistake. My wish for you is to live life, love deeply, and laugh often.

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It is PAFF’s goal to present and showcase the broad spectrum of Black creative works, particularly those that reinforce positive images and help to destroy negative stereotypes. We believe film and art can lead to better understanding and foster communication between peoples of diverse cultures, races, and lifestyles, while at the same time, serve as a vehicle to initiate dialogue on the important issues of our times.Each year, PAFF presents:Over One Hundred (100) quality films from the United States, Africa, the Caribbean, Latin America, Europe, the South Pacific and Canada, all showcasing the diversity and complexity of people of African descent.One of America’s largest fine art shows featuring prominent and emerging black artists and fine crafts people, including local, national and international poets, musicians and storytellers.www.paff.org
URBAN LYFESTYLES MAGAZINE SEEKS WRITERS, VIDEOGRAPHERS, PHOTOGRAPHERS MUST BE ABLE TO TURN WORK IN DAILY!THIS IS A VOLUNTEER PROJECT WITH GREAT EXPOSURE TO ACTORS, PRODUCERS, ECT.PLEASE EMAIL KIMIRHOCHELLE@YAHOO.COM
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