"The moment you think that you know it all and can do it all on your own, is the moment you give up your opportunity to change lives. But worry not, what you refuse to do, others will gladly take your spot!" -- Felicia Davis
Hi rickey johnson! Wouldn't it be nice to have someone in your life that you trust completely enough to let your guard down and tell them what's really going on -- especially during the times when you're struggling or feeling anxiety about something that you need to get done? Or even better yet -- what if you had someone who is so jazzed up about what you're doing and where you're going that they're introducing you to others -- even when you're not around. Wouldn't that be oh so grand....
I attended a meeting this morning hosted by my friend and colleague Dr. Joel Martin. She hosts a monthly forum called Conversation on Leadership (COL) which is an intimate gathering of community leaders making their mark in their own way. I am very selective on the networking meetings that I attend because I place a premium on my time and I can only afford to spend time where I can add value and/or receive value - this is true for me both personally and professionally. Personally, if I'm not having fun or feeling a true connection, I try to add more of what I want but if the connection still isn't there, I move on. Life is too short to operate any other way. What I really love about COL is that it's different. It's designed to be our time to focus on us and what we can do to take our work to the next level. There is absolutely no room for ego or titles to get in the way of us disarming, learning and getting the support we need from our learning partners. Today's session was facilitated by Dr. Robin Postel and she did an awesome job leading us through a change process that allowed us to get unhooked from a challenge in order to move forward powerfully with our work. I learned a lot and as usual, left our meeting feeling whole, complete and fully embraced by a group of like-minded leaders who place a premium on sowing seeds into their own development knowing that it is the ONLY way that we can do this work and have it be life-shifting. I'm also excited that Dr. Joel is one of many thought-leaders who will be leading an upcoming discussion with the members of The Emerge Leaders' Circle.  After leaving our meeting, I immediately thought about a book that I read a few years ago by Keith Ferrazzi called Who's Got Your Back. It's a fabulous book that teaches the concept of building lifeline relationships. These are the people with whom you can really count on, open up to and share your fears and your failures while asking for help without worrying about being judged. These are also the very same people with whom you can share your goals and dreams with and they will be your guideposts, helping to lift you up and watch your back as you make your way over the top.
I especially love the book because it helps to disarm you just enough to realize that even as an expert in your domain of excellence, Superwoman is a myth and you do not or will not have all the answers. At some point, you'll have to realize that the best of you comes from a co-creation of the wisdom, guidance and tough love that your lifeline partners give you. The problem is that some people seldom get to a place where we ask for help - the support that we need to move forward. Why? Fear...fear of being seen as weak, incompetent, unable to play at the same level or simply not meeting the expectations of those who are expecting big things from you. This has such a crippling effect that we become immobilized, stuck and often paralyzed by our own actions or lack thereof.
The book suggest four reasons why lifeline relationships are necessary:
1. To help us get in agreement with ourselves about how we define success on an 'individual' level.
2. To develop a plan to get us there with strategies that are inclusive of both lifeline and strategic partners.
3. To identify and make a commitment on what we will stop doing and say no to in order to move forward.
4. To surround ourselves with people who have our best interest at heart. These are the people who are going to give it to us real, raw and relevant so that we can transform our lives from great to remarkable!
The first month of 2013 is behind us and now is the perfect time to start developing your own lifeline relationships. You need to know who's got your back and who's back you will have. If you haven't already, figure out who you want in this innermost circle of your life, have a direct conversation about your intention, develop some specific actions that will guide your newfound partnerships (this is also the what signals to you that it's working) and get busy creating the environment for the magic to unfold!
Until next time...
Be remarkable!
Felicia
P.S. I would love for you to join me in The Emerge Leaders' Circle. It's the perfect next step in my work where you sow a seed into your own development and it's guaranteed to reap an ROI well above your financial investment. Our first Masterclass is next Wednesday and the topic is Maximizing Your Leadership Style for Optimum Results. Go here for detailsand feel free to shoot me an email with questions.
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