inspiration (51)

So, let me tell you about my adventure yesterday.

Yesterday, we celebrated a new year with King T.  A few months back, our daughters and I planned to gift him with a day at the U.S. National Whitewater Center.  This place is grand.  You can go and do absolutely nothing and absolutely everything, and will have a memorable time.

One of our planned adventures was a twenty-foot-above-ground obstacle course.  While waiting for our turn, we observed the small children and adults (including seniors) who ventured out before us. Although they all seemed to be getting through the course successfully, the concentrating eyes and clenched jaws were giving me pause.  But, it can't be that bad. Right?

"Next person", said the attendant. I go up the steps, she connects me to the safety rope, and looks me in the eyes sternly. "Once you begin this course, you have to finish it." Only thing I could imagine at that moment was a steel door closing between me, her, my family and everyone else standing in line. Gulp.

Twenty feet above ground doesn't sound too bad -- when you're on the ground.

Our Shared Perspectives

Once the course was over, as a family we shared exactly how we felt about that adventure.

King T. - What have I've gotten myself into. It was great, man.  Loved it.

Me- Ditto. But also, I took on each obstacle at a time. I did not think about the one ahead, and after each one, I stood on the platform feeling accomplished and determine to master the next.

Warrior Princess Z. - The first step was harder than I thought.  I did not try to control the safety rope, because I knew it would come with me. I was able to plan my strategy and not think so much about falling to the ground, because I knew that I could rely on the safety rope.

Warrior Princess T. - Well.... we did not have to ask her about her perspective, because we heard it (everyone there heard it).

Her Fight Overpowers Her Flight

My young lady snot-nose cried on the fourth obstacle. Do I blame her? Not at all. She physically displayed what we ALL were feeling. Although she was hesitant from the first step, never once did she say, "I can't do this. I don't want to do this. I'm turning back." I heard her crying behind me, and although I empathized with her, I could not, would not default to the "mommy is here" mode. Why? Because I know my child. Her fight always wins out. And to be honest, she likes for me to just be there, not hover (I like that about my children). So, there she was crying, yet each time I looked up (Warrior Princess Z. and I were finished. Woo.) she was finished with one obstacle and on to the next. Her daddy was just heart-melting brilliant -- encouraging her. The couple behind her were encouraging and the fifty plus people waiting in line were cheering her on.  They even clapped and congratulated her when she was finished. They understood. I was/am so proud of my girl. I did not hug her, I high-fived her and patted her on the shoulder and said, "You did good." She liked that.

As we walked and talked, I said, "I bet if we come back next week, you'll be able to do that course again." She replied with a resounding, "Yup." Back straight. No hesitation in her response. A determine look.

Don't you just love that?

We All Have It

Flight and Fight is within us all.

You know that feeling. That inadequate feeling.

Flight tells you to stay in bed; no one is going to support this project; you failed, why not give up; how dare you think you deserve to feel accomplished. And it's so audible -- that was flight crying from the mouth of my daughter.

Fight tells you to persevere; get your butt out of bed, off the sofa; make some phone calls; stay present in what you want to accomplish; this project will get done; how are you going to get support if you don't do; how will you know if you don't try; so what you failed, but did you learn?

My daughter is a prime example of how if you want it bad enough, if you want to overcome obstacles in the way, if you want to get down from a twenty-foot obstacle course, you have got to let Fight propel you forward.

So many days I have felt the warm caress from Flight. Fight reminds me that it's a trick. Revolt!

Flight is needed.  It's there for a very good reason. That reason..... Danger. So, if you're not in danger from your aspirations, don't rely on it. Instead rely on the safety rope called Fight.

Remember, when it comes to accomplishing goals, the only difference between those who succeed and those who don't is Flight or Fight.

Which do you choose today, Flight or Fight?

Below are photos of our adventure (one has a short video snippet of King T. on the Mega Zip, 46-foot drop, 1,123 feet zip).  Enjoy.

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Be Whole,

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4 Ways a Gratitude Journal Can Benefit You

It’s November, and that means Thanksgiving is right around the corner. During this month, many people think about all the good they have in their lives and the things they have to be thankful for. Of course, I believe it’s important to have an attitude of gratitude 365 days a year, and creating a gratitude journal is a great place to start with this. Here are four ways having one can benefit you:

  1. A gratitude journal helps you keep things in perspective. It allows you to see that no matter how bad things may be right now, they could be worse, so you always have something to be thankful for.
  2. It encourages you to begin looking for the positive throughout your day.
  3. A gratitude journal puts you in a positive mood. After a while, you begin to see all the good you have in your life — big and small.
  4. It helps you to not take the little things for granted. You’ll have those days when nothing seems to be going right, and you can’t seem to think of anything to be thankful for. That’s when you dig deep, and think about the fact that you have breath in your body, some food, clothing, shelter, a family, etc. — the things you usually forget about because they’re always there.

How do you create a gratitude journal?

It’s simple! Just get a notebook or journal, and every night, write down three to five things that you’re grateful for. Try to think of something that happened during that day that you can be thankful for, like getting a new client or hearing from a friend you haven’t talked to in a while. You can also write about things you’re grateful for in general, like life, health and family. That’s it! (Easy, right?). Get started with your gratitude journal today, and remember:

Whatever our individual troubles and challenges may be, it’s important to pause every now and then to appreciate all that we have, on every level. - Shakti

 


For more articles like this, visit my blog, For Colored Gurls.

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Be Encouraged !

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There was a song I used to listen to several years back.

The words were… Be Encouraged – No Matter What’s Going On — He’ll Make it Alright by William Becton & Friends.

This past week we launched the 21 Day Encouragement Campaign. For 21 days you will hear from men and women of faith that have gone from victim to VICTORIOUS! They will share how they survived and what encouraged them to keep going. To sign up for the 21 day series click here.

The word of God tells us that “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging” (Psalms 46:1-3)

Do you believe that? We read the words in the bible, we jump, shout and get all “emotional” but do we really believe that GOD is an ever present help in the time of trouble.

If we were completely honest, most of us would say No. That doesn’t make you “unsaved” or a bad person. It makes you human. There is a story in the bible where a father brought his son to Jesus to be healed. Click here to finish

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Lessons I've Learned from my Mac

So I've finally taken the plunge. I ditched my PC (sort of) & bought a Macbook. My reason for wanting a Mac was because I wanted to increase my video & graphic abilities, and I heard Mac was the way to go. Plus, I have an iPhone & iPad, which I love, so why not, right?  Well, I have to be honest and say that my plunge has been more like a slow crawl and I haven't quite made it to the land of computer bliss, yet.  But in my frustration of making the transition, I have learned a couple of lessons that I think can be applied to life.

1. If you scared, say you scared!

The first thing that is glaringly obvious is that there IS a difference between the navigation of a Mac & a PC. While there are a lot of similarities, the differences have been frustrating and intimidating.  I have waved my white banner and sent up SOS signals more than once and to as many people who will listen.  In life, change can be scary. And while we know that we have not been given the spirit of fear (2 Tim 1:7), it's okay to acknowledge the fear so that you'll know which enemy you're fighting.  Applied knowledge is power.  If you're walking around in a state of denial or a pseudo-spiritual fog, you will miss the opportunity to tap into your power to defeat the enemy of fear, worry, lack or defeat. So, if you're scared, say you're scared, and then suit up your armor. Here's a hint: The fight is fixed! You win in the end!

2. Familiarity keeps you bound.

I'll admit that many times, while navigating my Macbook, I just want to go back to my PC.  I've worked on a PC all of my life.  I'm familiar with its functions, I understand its limitations and we're like old friends.  Comfortable.  But what I know to be true is that "comfort is the enemy to progress."  The moment you're too comfortable in a situation, you lose your edge. You lose your drive and desire to improve.  You settle for "good enough" and you stop growing.  That is such the opposite of the life God has planned for you.  He has ordained an abundant, full, ever-evolving life. And MOST TIMES, you have to be willing to get uncomfortable to grow to the next level.  Understand that familiarity keeps you bound.

3. Just do it!

As it relates to the purchase of my Macbook, I had been thinking and talking about it for at least a year.  My laptop was a dinosaur in computer age and it had long stopped performing at its maximum level, despite tune-ups & upgrades.  Because of the nature of my work, I NEED a reliable computer.  So what was I waiting for?  My hard-drive to crash? (Been there, done that, too).  In life, many of us have goals, visions and dreams that we've been mulling over for years. We're waiting for the "right conditions" before we go back to school, launch a new career or start our ministry.  But the Bible admonishes us that, "He who observes the wind [and waits for all of the conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap" (Ecc. 11:4 Amp).  In other words, waiting for everything to be perfect stops you from moving forward and subsequently hinders you from reaping the benefits of attaining your goal. So, my encouragement to you is to just do it!

In life, I've experienced my greatest rewards when I just went for what I wanted despite my fears or uncertainties.  It's okay if you don't know all of the answers, just trust in the One who does.  Understand that God has your best interest at heart and desires that you live the abundant life that He ordained for you.  As for me and my Mac?  I'm going to keep getting back on the saddle until I get it.  I understand that the reward will be great...only if I keep trying.

These are the lessons I've learned from my Mac.  Do you have any to share? I'd love to hear from you!

 

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  • Want advice from from real entrepreneurs who've been where you are?
  • Need inspiration to get started or keep moving forward in your business?

If so, I think you'll love this! I'm so happy to announce that in February 2013, I'll be launching a magazine, exclusively for women entrepreneurs called flyy, female & fabulous! This publication is dedicated to profiling a variety of women entrepreneurs who encourage and motivate women who aspire to become entrepreneurs and those interested in growing their businesses.

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According to Merriam-Webster.com, one definition of “victorious” is:

  • having won a victory
  • of, relating to, or characteristic of victory

This led me to look up the definition of “victory,” which is achievement of mastery or success in a struggle or endeavor against odds or difficulties.

Here are a few characteristics I believe all victorious women possess:

  1. She knows how to let go of the past and other things that may hold her back so she can step into a brighter future. A victorious woman knows it does no good to hold on to grudges or allow what happened in the past to hold her hostage. She understands that to move into the successful life she deserves and desires, she must forgive and let go.
  2. She finds a way to make her dreams come true. A victorious woman realizes that she has her dreams for a reason and that God didn’t give her her desires without a way to make them happen. She knows that the road may be long and have bumps and curves, but she also knows that she can and will find a way to bring her dreams and desires to fruition.
  3. A victorious woman isn’t defined by other people’s opinions of her. She knows that people will have their thoughts about her and what she does, but she knows that, at the end of the day, the only opinion that truly matters is her own and God’s. She understands that what is really important is walking in her calling and doing what she’s been purposed to do.
  4. She lets go of the idea of being perfect or “Superwoman.” A victorious woman realizes there’s no such thing as being perfect (i.e., flawless); she knows that she can and should be the best she can be. And she continuously strives for excellence and works on being the best version of herself.
  5. She stays away from negative situations and people. Although she may have to deal with them at times, a victorious woman does not constantly stay in situations that are negative and energy-draining, nor does she hang around individuals who continuously complain, gossip or who never have anything positive to say or contribute. She knows that she must surround herself with positivity.
  6. A victorious woman never lets defeat have the last word. She knows that her journey in life won’t always be easy or lined with gold. She knows that she will fall down, fail and have disappointments. But, a victorious woman always picks herself up, dusts herself off and keeps it moving until she reaches her destination!

Are there any other characteristics you would add? Please share below! 

 

Dreamer. Lover of life. Goal getter. These are just a few words to describe Jamie Fleming-Dixon, inspirational writer, blogger, editor and F.A.B. Life Strategist. She is the founder and editor-in-chief of For Colored Gurls, a personal development blog with the mission of inspiring and empowering women to live their most Fabulous lives. Additionally, she is owner of Mocha Writer, a boutique copy editing and proofreading service.

Jamie is also the author of How to Change Your Mindset + Live Your Most Fabulous Life, a motivational book, providing practical tips for creating a more positive mindset and living the life of one's dream. She has been featured in several websites, blogs, magazines and Blog Talk Radio Shows, including TheCEOMamma.com, AfroElle Magazine and Prominence Magazine and was recently named one of the 2012 50 Fabulous Women Entrepreneurs on BBWO (Black Business Women Online). Visit her online at jamieflemingdixon.com

 

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Cheryl Garrison

http://www.topleaderstraining.com/

http://www.mytopleaders.com

 

In honor of Mother’s Day on May 13, 2012, I would like to dedicate this post to my mother, Cheryl Garrison. In my interviews to business owners for PeopleWhoProsper.com, one of the questions I ask is, “Do you have a mentor? Who is it and why?” Commonly, the answer is the entrepreneur’s mother OR they will definitely mention their mother as an inspiration and/or help in their business; someone they can call on for advice.

Fortunately for myself, my mother is actually a business woman herself.  Therefore, I am able to confide in my mom on a personal and professional level. She is truly my inspiration, mentor and accountability partner to keep me on my toes. It is very rare that I make a business decision without consulting my mom.  I mean, why wouldn’t I? She has been in business for HERSELF for over 25 years JUST to take care of my siblings and me when we started school. I truly admire her for that. Even now, she continues to build successful businesses; mentoring women and helping people live a healthier life. I hope to make my child as proud of me as I am of my mom. She has made so many sacrifices in her life for her kids and sometimes we just need to recognize our mothers for that. That’s why I love Mother’s Day. It’s a chance to really thank your mother for all that she has done (whether living or in heaven). So, as we approach this day, I want to encourage you to continue to ask your mom for her advice and take it. Most times, it’s the best advice you will get!

"A  mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon   us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice   with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still   will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to   dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our   hearts."

~ Washington   Irving

Tamara Garrison-Thomas

 www.garrisonprosperitysolutions.com

 www.busy925.com

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It's all about me! ‘Me time' is an activity everyone should feel inspired to indulge in upon feeling stressed or depressed. Whether it is an hour, a day or a weekend (wouldn't that be ideal), ‘me time' is often needed. Without interruptions, make time to read a book, listen to an entire CD, indulge in a little pampering or whatever else comes to mind. The key is spending some quality time with YOU. Guilt free.

So, how do you get your ‘me time'? If you are a single parent, connect with other single parents. Trust me; they need a break just like you. When connecting with other single moms you can trade parenting responsibilities every other weekend or for a day. You can plan your ‘me time' activities around each mom's schedule. By doing this, you never have to worry about a babysitter. In a nutshell, it was a win-win situation!

If finding someone to watch the children is a challenge, take a day off work. While the children are in school, you have a minimum of six hours to soak in a bubble bath, walk in the park, go for a long ride or do whatever comes to mind. Heck, if you want to do absolutely nothing but relax on your couch in your pajamas (and enjoy a small cup of ice cream without a little person asking for a taste), that is exactly how you should spend your ‘me time'.

Or choose a weekend day. Whichever day works for you is a day that you are investing in your sanity. You are worth it!

Having the opportunity to spend a weekend at a destination that brings you peace of mind is another option.  Unfortunately, for many of us embarking on that getaway is not easily possible.  Therefore, you should put your creativity to use and explore other ideas that are more accessible. For example, hop in your car and drive around town; take a tour of an area you have not visited. Treat yourself to a play and/or dinner; go for a walk in the park. There are so many options and if you take the time to explore you may find something you really enjoy.

You give your all and every now and again you have to take a break and regroup. After regrouping, you are mentally and physically prepared to move forward and take on the next challenge. Do not allow feelings of unworthiness to set in. Don't even think about feeling as if you don't deserve or have time for YOU; you are the one who keeps it all together. That is why you should be inspired to take the time to reconnect with your inner peace of mind and allow it to be exuded on the outside.

In the words of editor, writer, and journalist Susan Taylor, "We need quiet time to examine our lives honestly and openly . . . spending quiet time gives your mind an opportunity to renew itself and create order."

 

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Try Again, Fail Again, Fail Better!

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‘Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.’ – Samuel Beckett

‘If at first you don’t succeed try try again!’ As a child we have this concept so deep in our veins that trying again isn’t a question but an obsession. Think about the time you first learned to ride a bike, how many times did you fall off? How many times did you try again? Uncountable! Or how about when you were first introduced to basketball, how many times did you throw the ball at the hoop before it went in? Uncountable! What about tying your shoes laces, memorising your home telephone number, getting cookies of the top shelf. How many times? Uncountable. What was it about us as children that made us such naturally determined beings. Simplicity is the answer. We didn’t clog our minds with numerous scenarios, possibilities, predictions and we didn’t dwell on the past. Just because it didn’t work yesterday had no relevance to today. The only thing in mind was the goal and so we tried again and again and again and again and again and then ‘Yeah, I did it, I did it! Look at me, mommy daddy, I did it!’

‘It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not live at all. In which case, you’ve failed by default.’ – J.K. Rowlings

As adults we complicate matter so much so that we build a strong enough fear of failure to dissuade us from even trying. Have you notices when someone succeeds we ask questions like, at what age? How long did it take you? Was it your first attempt? Sometimes such questions can even lead us to feel ashamed of our achievement because it was not achieved within a certain parameter.

‘Ultimately, we all have to decide for ourselves what constitutes failure, but the world is quite eager to give you a set of criteria if you let it,’ – J.K. Rowlings

If you’re of healthy body and sound mind, there’s no reason to stop trying. The only failure is never having tried. Stop reasoning yourself out of even taking the first step, stop weighing up the pros and the cons, stop building up a case for why not to bother. So what if no one has ever done that before? So what if it might not work? So what if you’ve already tried? So what if you don’t have the required credentials, try to get them then try again. Just Keep Trying. Just Keep Going. Just Keep Swimming.

‘Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.’ – Dale Carnegie

We’ve all heard the saying ‘life is short’, but the truth is that life is long, so ask yourself, what else am I planning on spending all that time doing if not trying to realise my dreams?

‘The worst thing one can do it not to try, to be aware of what one wants and not give into it, to spend years in silent hurting, wondering if something could have materialized – and never knowing’ – David Viscott

Remember that its not just the success of your goal that is important, you learn much more in the time spent trying to reach your goal. See your time of trying as a journey and don’t forget to stop and take pictures along the way because at the end of the road you will want to look back and smile at how far you’ve come.

 

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Why you should Break Free from Comfort

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Comfort means you’re safe, you’re in a domain that is not opposing or challenging, you’re familiar with that around you and there is no intent on changing from your large, strong and coo-shy safety net, but what happens when you want to break free from that net, jump back into the ocean or spread your wings? DISCOMFORT! Facing new challenges is exactly that as it means taking a risk, a chance, grasping at an opportunity. There's nothing comfortable about striving to achieve a goal but there is joy in the making of dreams.

 

A dream is your creative vision for your life in the future. You must break out of your current comfort zone and become comfortable with the unfamiliar and the unknown. - Denis Waitley

 

As black women we are all to ready to clutch to our comfort zones, we take a step, two or three, achieve a university degree, a white career and then phew we made it, and it feels good being right here, so let’s stay right here, in the comfort zone. If that’s were your dream ended then congratulations be proud of yourself but that doesn’t mean you have to stop dreaming.

 

 We shall have no better conditions in the future if we are satisfied with all those which we have at present. - Thomas Edison

 

Discomfort is falsely associated with failure and we misinterpret the feeling of discomfort and evade it where we should welcome it. Ever heard the expression ‘no pain, no gain’? We understand this very well for beauty and fitness but fail to recognise the same for our professional and personal progression, although it’s entirely the same game.

 

Progress always involves risk; you can't progress to second base and also keep your foot on first. - Christie Mason

 

Success is always preceded by a temporary condition of discomfort and discomfort is a temporary condition of expanding your comfort zone, but the longer you dwells in a comfortable the greater the number of situations that make you feel uncomfortable will grow.

 

Nobody ever died of discomfort, yet living in the name of comfort has killed more ideas, more opportunities, more actions, and more growth than everything else combined. Comfort kills! - T. Harv Eker

 

Comfort is the most potent inhibitor of success. We must remember that as black people it took many stepping far outside of their comfort zone for us to finally arrive where we are today. In two of my earlier articles I address the history of Queen Amina the African warrior queen who achieved one of the greatest military success in African history and Harriet Tubman who refused to remain a slave and went on to free hundreds more. These great black women are fine examples that demonstrate; the higher the measures of discomfort the greater the achievement.

 

Be brave enough to live life creatively.  The creative is the place where no one else has ever been.  You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. - Alan Alda

 

In order to rise we must prepare to be discomforted, expect discomfort and welcome it with a “Hello old friend, let’s push the boundaries together again”. Make discomfort a familiar friend and not a stranger in so far as your competence allows and where is doesn’t find the tools to make it do so.

 

 

Original article can be found here: Why you should Break Free from Comfort.

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Recently, I was faced with a situation in which I hired and trusted a seemingly smart, professional and successful business woman only to be let down drastically by her actions. What you see is really not always what you get. Though I’ve always been a good judge of character, I must admit, I let my guard down which left me doing damage control.

“Reputation is the shadow. Character is the tree.” Abraham Lincoln

Character is who we are even when no one is watching; it’s doing the right thing! So, what attributes should one look for when hiring an Independent Contractor, partnering with other entrepreneurs or collaborating on a business project? These are 3 I’s which every entrepreneur should possess.

Integrity
Do you believe integrity is important both personally and professionally? Integrity is the foundation that we all should strive to live by. It exhibits the quality of one’s character! While morality is often associated with integrity, morality is what we believe while integrity is what we do with what we believe.

As an entrepreneur, integrity should be deeply rooted at inception of your business as it becomes the heart and soul of your company’s culture. Ask yourself:
  1. Is my business compatible with my values?
  2. Am I sure that my success is not coming at the expense of my family, personal and professional relationships or health?
  3. Do the vision of who I strive to be and the life I want to create fit with the business decision I have just made?
Answering these questions honestly can help you make adjustments where needed.

Inspiration

“If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then, you are an excellent leader.” Dolly Parton

The ability to inspire people to reach great heights of success is a key ingredient of a successful entrepreneur. Inspiration enthuses and ignites greatness. When you feel inspired it triggers emotions and feelings that enable you to live a purposeful life. I created Empower Yourself Daily Quotes to help others jumpstart their day with positive thoughts! In addition, here are 2 ways to inspire others:
  • Encourage: People face many difficult obstacles in life. Being supportive during tough times will enable others to rise up and overcome life’s hardships.
  • Challenge: Sometimes people are not sure of that next step to take in their life. By holding them accountable, will push them to achieve more.
Involvement
Have you ever considered the impact you would make on the lives of others by sharing your time and talent? Volunteering or mentoring is such a non-selfish way to give back! There are many ways you can reach out; find non-profit organizations in your area that you feel compelled to work with and volunteer; help your local library or hospital; or mentor youths or adults.

In conclusion, though there are many traits necessary for success in business and life, these are my top three.
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