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In recent months there’s been a brouhaha surrounding the so-called plight of single black women, arguably spearheaded by Steve Harvey’s best-selling Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man and brought into prominence on the internet by Nightline’s controversial “Why Are Black Women Single” and Helena Andrews’s newly-released Bitch Is the New Black. I’ve read everything from scary statistics to scary solutions and thought I’d offer my input on the topic: single (black) women, don’t despair because relationships and the family that they often engender are not always what they’re cracked up to be.

I love having a husband and children. To have a partner who supports and respects you, who brings out the best in you while reminding you, from time to time, that you’re not perfect, and someone with whom you can laugh often is what a lot of us women – and men – dream of. To discover the divinity of unconditional love that comes with children is a gift I would bestow upon everyone. To be the one person a young child comes to for comfort when she’s sick or scared or just wants to cuddle is validation that you’re doing something right.

However, marriage and motherhood come with a downside so steep I sometimes long for the advantages I had when I was single. Below are the five most important things I traded when I lost my single status.

1. Uninterrupted sleep. At least my kids don’t sleep through the night. When one wakes up for a drink of water, you wake up to give it to her. When you realize that the body lying next to you is not your partner, you have to get up and put said body (sometimes kicking and screaming) back in its own bed and sit there until it falls asleep. I’m a light sleeper so when my husband breathes too loud or, heaven forbid, snores, I’m wide awake staring at the ceiling. He pulls the comforter off me and rolls it around his heavy body so that I wake up … cold. When all this happens as often as it does in our home, you’re exhausted, and you still have to get up at 6:45 the next morning and drop the
one child off at school and give your undivided attention, all day, to the one who’s at home. They don’t understand, nor do they care, that Mama’s tired. They want Mama to take them to the playground or color or play with their dolls. That’snot to imply that single women always get their eight hours a night. The difference is that the latter is usually by choice. You stay up late to polish
that presentation that might get you that promotion. You were with your girls until 3:00 am talking and laughing and having a good time. You wanted to watch the end of the late movie or you were on FaceBook way too late.

2. The right to be sick. When I was growing up, I heard my mother say that with young children you can’t even be sick. This is one of the hardest parts of parenthood. Whether you have the flu or a bad cold, when you’re sick, all you want to do is sleep, or at least lie on the couch and watch crappy TV. When you have a family, you have to keep going. The deal that my husband and I made when I left my job to work at home as a freelance writer and editor was that I would be the primary care giver. And it made sense. We depend primarily on his income, so he can’t up and leave work when the kids are sick. As his parents live over an hour away and as my parents live in America, when I’m sick I still have to go on. Lunches have to be made, milk has to be poured.

3. Time. My days are not fully my own although working from home has provided me with an enviable degree of control over my own schedule. However, having a family takes a good deal of that control away. Even before I had children, I couldn’t just not come home after work. If at the last minute I wanted to have drinks with my colleagues after work, I had to let my husband know. I always had to work with his schedule, and vice versa. It’s not just my week-end anymore. If there’s
something I want to do in the evening, personal or professional, I need to make sure my husband’s going to be home on time and vice-versa. There are no more spontaneous road trips to be had. Dinner has to be done by 6:00 in order to get the kids in bed by 7:30. Now my oldest has her play-dates and sports activities and so forth, and who gets to cart her around? And on whose time? Gone are the days when I could roll out of bed at 10:00 on a Sunday morning and pick up a doughnut and coffee on my way to spending the afternoon rollerblading around the streets of DC.

4. Individuality. This can be as banal as decorating your house or apartment exactly the way you want it with the furniture you picked out. It’s as mundane as leaving a stack of papers on the table before you go to work and finding it at the end of the day in the same place as where you left it. It’s
dealing with your own messiness and watching what you want on TV every night or choosing the movie you want to see every time. It’s about doing what you want to do without consulting with anyone or worrying about the long-term affects it’s going to have on your relationship or your children.

5. Being responsible for myself. This sums up the previous four points and is this simple: when I get up in the morning, I’m automatically responsible for three people. Sure, my husband helps me with the morning routine, but even with help, I’m responsible for getting myself and two children dressed, fed and out the door on time. If we go to my in-laws’ for the weekend, I have to pack and unpack for three people. If we go out for pizza, I have to think about sweaters and pull-ups and menu choices for three people. When I buy groceries, I have to consider that my husband always wants to eat meat and that my children don’t want to eat veggies. I can never go anywhere empty-handed; I’m either carrying a child or my children’s stuff. The family car, i.e. my car, is always full of crumbs and my husband is always reminding me that it needs to be cleaned.

I wouldn’t want my life to be any different than it is right now, and when these frustrations take the forefront of my daily thoughts, I balance them with the joys that come with my lifestyle choice. I don’t have too many regrets about how I’ve lived my life or the decisions I’ve made save this one: I wish that while I was single I could have embraced being responsible only for myself. The one piece of advice I’d like to give to all you single (black) ladies is to be where you are. Take stock of what you have right now and spend as little time and energy as possible on the illusions created around relationships and families. They’re not always everything they’re cracked up to be.

1. Build Your List from Scratch
2. More People Isn’t Necessarily Better: Don’t Add People Who Don’t Opt into Yourself
3. Don’t Buy Lists in the hope of getting Fast Leads
4. Don’t try to Sell to Your List every day or all the time
5. Don’t devalue your list buy selling them things they don’t want

The Color Of Olive Oil




Olive oil that comes from ripe olives is sweet, has a gold color, and is immediately ready for consumption . If the olives are not ripe the olive oil is bitter, has a greenish color, and normally has to age before it can be consumed. The viscosity of the olive oil depends strictly on the variety of the olives trees. Olive oil quality depends on the type of olive, climate, soil, extraction technique, handling and storage. Just like Cabernet Sauvignon grapes, olives require optimal conditions to develop into full-bodied, exceptional olive oil

Different Grades of Olive Oil




Virgin oil is the result of a single, simple pressing; in contrast, cold-pressed is a marketing label rather than a processing technique




Extra virgin is the highest quality olive oil -- characterized by "perfect flavor and odor, max acidity (oleic acid) of 1g/100g - 1% with maximum peroxide value mequiv 02/kg of 20." In some regions, extra virgin oil is judged by a panel of experts for taste, mouth feel, and aroma. This oil tends to be most delicate in flavor, and is preferred for salads or served at the table with bread for dipping, or added to soups and stews.





Fine virgin oil is just slightly less perfect -- with "maximum acidity (oleic acid) of 2g/100g - 2% with maximum peroxide value mequiv 02/kg of 20

The other officially designated grades of olive oil are the result of several chemical refining and blending processes:





Semi-fine or ordinary -- suitable for cooking when subtle flavor is not required.




Refined -- maximum acidity of .5g/100g, lacking the flavor of virgin oil.




Pure -- a low-cost blend of refined and virgin, such as you might find in large quantities at a discount food warehouse.




Pomace refers to the pounded olive residue. Refined olive-pomace oil and olive-pomace oil are lower-quality oils.




Pomace oil, olive cake, and lampante (or lamp grade olive oil) are not intended for human consumption, and are generally used for industrial or technical purposes, such as soap making.








Types of olive oil


Generally, olive oil is extracted by pressing or crushing olives. Olive oil comes in different varieties, depending on the amount of processing involved. Varieties include:




Extra virgin - considered the best, least processed, comprising the oil from the first pressing of the olives.




Virgin - from the second pressing.




Pure - undergoes some processing, such as filtering and refining.




Extra light - undergoes considerable processing and only retains a very mild olive flavour.






How To Buy Olive Oil


When buying olive oil you will want to obtain a high quality EXTRA VIRGIN oil. The oil that comes from the first "pressing" of the olive, is extracted without using heat (a cold press) or chemicals, and has no "off" flavors is awarded "extra virgin" status. The less the olive oil is handled, the closer to its natural state, the better the oil. If the olive oil meets all the criteria, it can be designated as "extra virgin".





What is pure and light olive oil? "Pure" olive oil is made by adding a little extra virgin olive oil to refined olive oil. It is a lesser grade oil that is also labeled as just "olive oil" in the U.S.




"Light" olive oil is a marketing concept and not a classification of olive oil grades. It is completely unregulated by any certification organizations and therefore has no real precedent to what its content should be. Sometimes, the olive oil is cut with other vegetable oils.









Olive oil versus canola oil


Do not fall into the hype which is put out by traditional medicine regarding the promotion of canola oil (rapeseed) as superior due to its concentration of monounsaturated fatty acids. Olive oil is far superior and has been around for thousands of years. Canola oil is a relatively recent development and the original crops were unfit for human consumption due to their high content of a dangerous fatty acid called euric acid.







Olive pomace oil - this is very refined olive oil, namely the residue that remains once the oil is pressed. It is of a very low grade and will be very cheap. It should be used for cleaning products rather than for cooking and consumption.

My Glory Hair Care Olive Oil & Moisture Plus Vitamins, we have one just for you just send an email to pictureperfecthealth@gmail.com to request yours now.

Have you ever visited Dolls Like Me? Its a wonderful online store featuring multicultural toys that many parents often have a hard time finding and toys, which of course every kid loves! As the founder of both BBWO and the Black Moms Club, I think one of the best parts of what I do is being able to feature wonderful websites for/by people of color.

In addition to DollsLikeMe.com here are 4 Other Websites that I picked specifically for you and the readers on my Black Parenting Blog:

• Cara B Naturally Hair Care Products, a Chemical-Free Line made specifically for Black Children
• Black And Married With Kids, a Black Family, Parenting and Relationship blog both mom and dad can enjoy
• AfroPartyHouse, Have a hard time finding party favors perfect for African American kids? Diverse Party Favors How Wonderful is that!
• CocoaBabies, Clothing Line with African American Babies, Toddlers, and Children in mind. Bought my son a shirt, 'Strong Black Man in the Making'. Her stuff is too cute!

Use Gratitude As a Positive Business Strategy
By Audrey Robinson

Posted By: The CSGroup INC.

Three Important Steps You Must Know!
Find Out More On This Article!
http://www.epiphanysoul.ws/


Gratitude is defined as a positive emotion that acknowledges a benefit that one has received or will receive. It is about showing others how thankful you are for their actions. This is reflected in how you act towards and respond to others. In business, gratitude is about realizing that every customer counts, even the difficult ones. It is about realizing that each day, each customer that you encounter is the reason that you are in business. Therefore, think of gratitude when you encounter your next customer, and think of how that customer can impact you personally. Show your customers how genuinely grateful you are for their business.

www.remaecsgroup.com, www.epiphanysoul.ws -Making it happen for you!

There are everyday actions that you can take to show your gratitude towards your customers:

1). Be willing to serve- even though at times, you may feel that you can't face another complaint, you must remember what the customer means to you- he is the life of your business. Then gratitude and willingness to serve will follow. You will find that this positive "friendly" attitude is contagious. Your customers will tell others how remarkable you are.

2). Always say thank you- thank you are two words that when used will always benefit you. Always thank your customers for their business and do it in a way that they know how grateful you are to have them (not just anyone) as a customer. Even though you are providing a service to them, they are building your business and in the long run providing opportunities for you and as well as for your family.

3). Always be positive- in any situation focus on only the positive. At times, this can be difficult to do, especially in the face of a ranting, raving customer. Stay calm and let the customer vent. Soon most will come back to reality. Keep in mind that this customer can impact you and your company. Therefore, think of a positive way to solve the problem. Then show the customer your gratitude for their allowing you to help them.

www.remaecsgroup.com, www.epiphanysoul.ws -Making it happen for you!

Remember, "when you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears" (Anthony Robbins). With a positive business strategy that includes gratitude as well as attitude, your business can flourish.

Dear Black Business Space CommUNITY,

Centuries ago, Aesop (the famous Black greek philosopher), provided us with a compelling parable that instructs as well as warns us about how to do business.

Its message could not be more timely: The fable recalls the story of a poor farmer who discovers in the nest of his goose a shining golden egg. He is suspicious, and starts to discard the egg, but then decides to have it appraised to determine its worth. He discovers the egg is pure gold!

The farmer is overwhelmed with his good fortune. He becomes even more excited when he finds that each day, as he visits the nest, there is a new egg.

Imagine his excitement as day after day he awakens to the thrill of finding a new egg! It all seems too good to be true. However, the farmer becomes wealthy beyond belief.

Then, with his newfound wealth, comes greed and impatience. Instead of waiting for each day to pass, he decides to get all of the eggs at once. He greedily opens the goose, only to find that it is empty. Not only are there no eggs, but now there will never be anymore. He has killed "the goose that laid the golden eggs."

For us, "Black business networking" is that goose. As Black entrepreneurs we have an enormous capacity to help Black people universally achieve economic health and financial freedom. However, with that incredible opportunity comes significant responsibility.

We have to do business THE RIGHT WAY! If we do, we ensure continued freedom and prosperity for everyone.

For that reason, the National Black Business Trade Association, established "Codes of Good Business Practice". These Codes have been adopted in order to define the duties, responsibilities and rights of members among themselves, the Black community, and the public in general as well as with the National Black Business Trade Association, Inc. (NBBTA) office and staff.

The purpose is to develop relationships which are more conducive to successful business practices, financial and community development, as well as the advancement of African peoples worldwide. While at the same time maintaining the right of each member to engage in a free and independent business enterprise.

CODE 1: Treat your customers, suppliers, employees, contractors, prospects and public as you would want to be treated. We are dedicated to the principle that if “you help enough people get what they want out of life, you will automatically get all you want out of life”. Service to others will always return great dividends. Its called, “synergy”. People working together in harmony and cooperation will accomplish much more than the same number of people working separately.

CODE 2: Each of us is an attitude away from greatness. Each of us is unique and special, with our own set of beliefs, talents, strengths, abilities, perceptions and values. Each of us is a product of our lifetime experiences. We base our decisions and actions upon these experiences. Each person has a unique contribution in life - each of us has innate worth and value. An attitude of total unconditional acceptance of others will cause each of us to allow for differences and help eliminate prejudice and judgmental thinking. By allowing another his own opinions and actions, individuals actually enhance their own self-esteem. We seek first to understand and then be understood.

CODE 3: The power to change your life is within your reach. We believe that each individual has the God-given right and responsibility to live freely. Each, as a mature, adult business person, must be given the right to operate independently and be allowed the freedom to succeed or fail based upon individual efforts and abilities. We are each responsible for our own well-being and growth - personally and financially. We seek to be compensated in the marketplace in direct portion to the value we bring to the marketplace.

CODE 4: What we do, we do for our children (future generations). The proper raising and education of our children is our collective responsibility. In addition to all else, we must teach them the importance of ownership, equity participation, international economic reciprocity and entrepreneurship as alternatives to laboring in the job market. We must lead by example, encouraging the creative process in all, bringing others along as we grow.

CODE 5: We each have the responsibility to deal with openness, honesty, and kindness in business and in life - to cause the best results possible. Once a difficulty or problem exists, the most effective manner to correct it is to go back to the root cause of the problem and treat that - not just superficially treating the effect. Following the ancient principle of “whatsoever you sow, so shall you reap!”, we acknowledge that each of us will reap exactly what we give out. Each of us will reap a life harvest - the size will depend upon our generosity at planting time, the quality will depend upon our diligence to tend the crop and the kind will depend upon the kind of seed we’ve sown. Eventually all our thoughts, words, actions and attitudes will come back to us. The principles exist that those dealing honestly, fairly and with integrity will find success, friendships and ultimately - happiness and peace.

CODE 6: One who masters the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him, he is always doing both.

These Codes reflect the positive nature of our mission and our desire to be of service to Black people throughout the world. If you look closely, you will notice that the first code really is a summation of all that follows.
Treat your customers, suppliers, employees, contractors, prospects and public as you would want to be treated. We are dedicated to the principle that if “you help enough people get what they want out of life, you will automatically get all you want out of life”.

Together, I believe we can fight the universal tendencies toward greed, negativity and impatience. I believe we can do business the old-fashioned way, with integrity and honesty. If we conduct our business THE RIGHT WAY, the goose will be healthy and our mutual abundance will be unmeasured. In the end, the only way to do good is to be good.

Peace and Blessings,

Lee Green, Chairman, National Black Business Trade Association (NBBTA)
and Founder, BlackBusinessSpace.com

Networking Increases NetWorth

Juniques

www.jusmcc.org

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Good Morning

I was just reading a blog and I had a revelation about my life. I often encourage others and try to make the best of their situation meaning I always find a way to make someone feel better concerning what is going on with them. However I realize that I dont do the same for myself. I look at me situation and pick it apart always pointing out the negatives but rarely give myself credit for the positives. I realize that I have to uplift my self more often and celebrate my achievements more often. I know that I am not where I want to be with my business or other areas of my life but I am not where I used to be. I have made great steps in starting and improving my business. I am also making great improvements with my life. If you are a person that nevers or rarely encourage and uplift yourself then you need to step back and look at what you are doing and have done and praise yourself for it. Life is too short not to pursue your goals and recognize when you have done great things.

New scholarships posted everyday)

Students Seeking Education by Experiencing Academic America (S.E.A.)

an Houston, Texas based mentoring program for high school students, students at risk, and college bound students who want to attend an Historically Black College / University. (HBCU).

S.E.A will post a scholarship list for minority students each day. If you are a high school senior, junior, or an transferring college student, these scholarships are for you. FREE MONEY! We all know through life there is nothing Free, you have to apply to receive this money. Your cost is time. The time it takes to fill out the scholarship application.. Look for the S.E.A. blog each day, highlighting a new scholarship listing 2010/2011

Full Tuition Academic Scholarships

This page lists full tuition academic scholarships, such as trustee scholarships and presidential scholarships. These scholarships are often awarded by colleges as a way to attract talented students.

The scholarships listed on this page satisfy the following criteria:

These awards are only available to students who enroll at the indicated colleges.

To find other academic scholarships, search the FastWeb scholarship database.

Full Tuition Academic Scholarships

go to the site listed below.

http://www.finaid.org/scholarships/academicscholarships.phtml

SCHOLARSHIP OF THE DAY

8-20-2010

Star Supporter Scholarship/Loan

Scholarships in the form of forgivable loans are available to Black/African-Americans preparing for ministry. One year of full-time professional ministry reduces loan by one third. Three years of service repays loan. Must be member of the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ), have a C+ average, demonstrate financial need, be a full-time student in an accredited school or seminary and be under the care of a regional Commission on the Ministry.

Application may be submitted electronically.

Deadline: March 15.

Academic/Career: Areas Religion/Theology.

Award: Forgivable loan for use in freshman, sophomore, junior, or senior years; not renewable

Amount: $2000.

Eligibility Requirements: Applicant must be Disciple of Christ; Black (non-Hispanic) and enrolled or expecting to enroll full-time at a two-year or four-year institution or university. Applicant must have 2.5 GPA or higher. Available to U.S. citizens.

Application Requirements: Application, financial need analysis, references, transcript. Deadline: March 15. .

CONTACT:

Shaina Vardis, Administrative Assistant
Disciples of Christ Homeland Ministries
PO Box 1986
Indianapolis, IN 46206-1986
Phone: 317-713-2666
Fax: 317-635-4426
E-mail: svardis@dhm.disciples.org
Web: http://www.discipleshomemissions.org

p.s. If you need help in your scholarship search, please contact

S.E.A. c/o NORRIS COLEMAN @ mr.nncoleman@yahoo.com

*As part of S.E.A. Mentoring Program, we want to build our Mentees vocabulary. S.E.A. has chosen to italicize words and statements in blue for our Mentee to understand and use in their vocabulary