There needs to be more awareness about Women's Heart Health. That is why this movie was made. Watch this movie with someone you love.
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It’s time to Let Go
From our thoughts and our heart
It’s time to Let Go
So we can move forward
To forgive someone is sometimes easier said than done.
What is it to forgive someone? I have been hurt physically & emotionally. It will take a lot for me to get over all the hurt that I had to endure and yet I must find a way to forgive. It is very easy to see or feel how much someone hurts us, however we may not always see or feel how much we also have hurt others. Maybe if we could understand where our hurt comes from, it would be easier to forgive. If we could find a way to let go completely we would be able to move forward.
My husband and I didn’t communicate to each other and that caused us both to jump to conclusions based on our past. We didn’t love ourselves enough to be honest about our own hearts and feelings. We didn’t allow ourselves to become one because we both held on to our past hurt so much. By holding onto those past hurts we let ourselves experience the hurt over and over again instead of allowing us to heal together. We were our own worst enemies. We knew we had something special because God brought us together to help each other. We knew that we had gone through the same things and therefore should be able to understand each other. We should have been able to help each other and yet we let our own feelings cause us the pain we tried so hard to avoid. My husband and I experienced a selfish -kind of hurt. I say that because we were too concerned about ourselves rather than being concerned about each other. This selfish hurt caused us to not let go and therefore, we could not move forward. The sad thing about it is that we caused our own problems by being selfish. He did not cause my hurt and I did not cause his hurt, we were both responsible for our own hurt.
How could we ever forgive each other if we were not willing to let go of the hurt we had built up inside ourselves? In order to forgive others we must first look in the mirror and see who we are. Are we holding onto hurt feelings and holding someone else responsible for our feelings? Everyone has a past and our past makes us who we are, however our past is just that…”our past”…it is not our future. I had to look inside myself to find what drives the force of forgiveness for me personally. I had to look within myself to find the peace in my heart that allowed me to forgive. My life consisted of many experiences which I held on to. Some of those experiences were good and some were bad. I realized that by holding on to those experiences, they had a part in developing me as a person. I choose how to categorize each experience and how to let each experience shape my life. Because, we as humans, tend to dwell on the bad or negative, I allowed those bad and negative experiences to control my inner self. I don't think we realize when we do this. I don't think we even realize that it is our choice how we live. We are in control of our self no one else can control what is in us...only we have that control. I had to realize this to understand how to forgive. My husband was not responsible for the feelings I had. Those feelings were in me long before I even met him. My feelings of insecurity, my feelings of being unloved, my feelings of having no self esteem were my choices. It was my choice to allow my feelings to be confirmed by his words or actions. It was my choice to allow him to affect my life in a negative way. What happened to me...was not me. I had always tried to live my life in a positive way. One of the main beliefs I lived by was that everything in life is a gift from God. Everything is an experience that God has allowed us to have. You do not know the reason, however at the very base we were given each experience to learn from and possibly to use to help someone else in the future who may also go through the same experience. I lost this belief, because I choose to. I was not strong enough within myself to realize what I was allowing to happen. I had to look within myself to be able to forgive myself enough to let go of the choices I kept buried in my heart. I had to let go of the bad choices I was allowing to control my life and my feelings. I had to accept that my choices are mine...no one else's. To understand the unique person that God made me to be, allowed me to not only accept myself as a beautiful creation of God, I was also able to forgive myself and accept my own choices. By accepting my self, I can accept that my husband is his own person also....an equally beautiful creation of God who was allowed his own unique choices (good or bad). In realizing this, I realized that my husband is responsible for his own choices and I don't have to allow his choice to affect me in a negative way. The story I have expressed was from my heart, however it is not a true story in that it was not only my heart that was involved. My husband went through his own types of pains and hurts. My husband was also a victim of my choices. My husband deserves the right to be who God created him to be without judgment or blame from me or anyone else. Just as I became the person I became, he also became the person he became due to his past and the very hard and unique challenges he had to experience. No one can say that either he; nor I was more or less to blame... we are who we are because God made us this way. God has a reason for each of us, that is why he created us each as a unique individual. I am blessed and able to accept and love myself and my husband as the unique and blessed people that God has created us to be. I am a perfect creation of God and so is my husband; that is the reason God brought us together… for each other. For me to forgive was to find peace within myself through Christ. To forgive I had to replace the hurt in my heart with Love.
I forgive because I accept the blessings God has given us as individuals.
Maybe to forgive others
to be able to forgive ourselves;
and now in front of the world...
To my Husband.....
I forgive you!
Can you forgive me?
We all want to live the uncommon life. I know I do. As a coach, I value change and reinvention. I believe change is necessary for energizing your soul. The one thing I know is that changing your perspective is key to an uncommon life. In order to see the fluidity of life, you must see it through a new eye. This may require daily refocusing. It's like refreshing your eye "browser." We need to refresh every now and then with a new direction, new relationships, new knowledge, new assignments and whatever else that will jumpstart us out of the common to the uncommon. If you are responding to life out of the old eye, allow me to share some concepts on how to live the uncommon life.
- It's important to see yourself as a brand. You are your own message. Ask yourself, "what am I saying to people when they encounter me? Who and what do you represent? Make the appropriate adjustments to deliver the right message.
- It's important to reinvent yourself 2-3 times in your life because there is so much more untapped potential on the inside of you that it will take your whole lifespan to bring it out.
- You must be active in the game of life - you must keep going because success comes through working it out. Giving up is not an option unless you know that you are absolutely in the wrong place. And even then, take what you've learned in that place and keep moving forward.
- Stop looking at the mountain top and purpose in your heart to start at the level you know you fit. Then, advance up the mountain one step at a time. Cover all of your bases.
- Figure out what your goals are because doing nothing will cost you. Create weekly, monthly, yearly goals.
- You can get what you want as a long as you can help other people to get what they want. In other words, don't live a selfish life. What you do for others, God will make happen for you.
- Listen to your dissatisfaction. Sometimes when you are unsatisfied, your heart may be trying to tell you something. Don't override your internal alarm system.
- You must see things that normal people don't see. Train your eye to see beyond what is there. Examine the different territories that you find yourself in and create from what you see.
- Learn to give more than you have. God's economy is vastly different than the world's economy. It doesn't make sense to give when you don't have anything, but when you sow into people's lives, you shall reap. It's the law of nature.
- Move away from people who don't believe in you and who don't agree with the plan for your life. Otherwise they will pull on your motivation and enthusiasm. Stay connected to people who bring light into your life.
Want to know more about how to live an uncommon life using what's already on the inside of you, visit www.unlimitedcoaching4you.com for more information. Do you want to become a coach, a new Become a Certified Coach program in life coaching and health and wellness is about to start in September. Contact me for more information.
I have been gone for awhile as I was concentrating on a new challenge. We started with DJs Unique Sound & Entertainment which was established to help local artist brand themselves and gain exposure through social media. We have expanded and are extremely excited to announce....DJs Unique Sound Charities. DJs Unique Charities is a non profit in Phoenix, Arizona. Our ultimate goal is to obtain a motor home and to convert it into a mobile recording studio. Our mission is to help youth by giving them a way to express themselves in a positive way through music and photography instead of negatively in the streets. It has been a slow start, however, believe in what we are doing and we know our work will help build up self esteem and self worth. If we can make a difference in one person's life, all the work is worth what we put into it. We are always looking for suggestions/help.
DJs Unique Sound Charities
Working from home is great!
I do not miss the hours spending in traffic but I notice I spend a lot of hours sitting in from of my computer. I have even gained a few pounds which surprised me because I was not snacking or eating more than usual. But I figured out I was a desk potato!
Sometimes I was in front of the computer from the time my husband left early in the morning until he showed back up in the evening only taking quick bathroom breaks or a short lunch.
So I took a few steps to make a change:
- I started a 30 minute exercise routine in the morning
- I make sure that I get up a stretch every 2 hours for about 10 minutes
- When on a call I walk around if I do not need the computer.
This Mother’s Day I am helping my mom raise money for the WALK OF LIFE. This cause is close to us as my mom was born with a hole in her heart and after fighting breast cancer years ago the treatment has left her well but still less then perfect.
I'd like to invite you to join me in raising funds for the Cardiac Health Foundation of Canada's - GTA WALK OF LIFE for "prevention, education & cardiac rehabilitation". Click the link below to view my fundraising page and sponsor my efforts OR COME & JOIN IN!!!
WALK OF LIFE incentives: FREE CINCH BACKPACK ! FREE PEDOMETER ! FREE PARKING ! FREE BREAKFAST !
AND to ALL Participants who raise minimum $100 in donations - A FREE POLAR HEART SPORTS BRA and the registration FEE is waived!! Plus, if you register before April 27th and you raise $100 or more, you will be eligible to win a fabulous Early Bird Prize - a Vermont Castings BBQ valued at over $1,200!!!
P.S. Remember the WALK OF LIFE is on Saturday May 15, 2010.at the OSC. Registration at 8:00am (www.walkoflife.ca).
What does that mean? Let's take a closer look.
For an example, at one time or another, we all have felt one thing but acted in another way which was inconsistent with how we felt. For example, you may have thoughts about what you need to do, and all you experience are just the thoughts without any connection of those thoughts to the feelings you are experiencing while entertaining those thoughts. We tend to miss all the valuable information being conveyed to us by what the feeling is telling us. Without "integrating" the thoughts and the feelings, usually, perhaps as much as 95% of the time, we are susceptible to taking an action that ends up being a mistake.
The power of Integrative Thinking says this:
Go into that place and you integrate the aspects of your thoughts, what you are feeling – in some circles we call that "heart-mind." This is the domain where you connect the heart with the mind. It is so valuable to integrate the heart and the mind so that they work as a team and are not separate from and unknown to each other.
How can you incorporate this method of Integrative Thinking in your life?
For example, take a look at a project are you working on, or a relationship you are engaged in, and evaluate the effectiveness of the project or relationship.
Suppose you are responsible for getting out a mailing at work. You typically begin with what we call the "nitty-gritty" of what is necessary to accomplish the task. You might define the task by writing it down, researching it, and making a task list, step by step. Then you can create a plan for getting it done. For example, with the mailing project, this might include things like contacting companies that sell mailing lists or companies that mail your information out for you. The goal is to create a plan that integrates every aspect of the project, taking into consideration that you may not be the best person to carry out every aspect of the project, but you will plan it, oversee it and make sure it gets done.
As another example, if you want to create a harmonious business organization, or if you want to develop a harmonious relationship with a person, either in a work context or in a personal relationship, it is important to look at the qualities of each person integrating all aspects of the person. There are four basic qualities, patterns or elements that we ought to consider:
1. Emotional Balance. Here we observe and assess the emotional aspect of where that person is really at. We ask ourselves, "Does this person tend to be emotionally stable or do they have a tendency to be emotionally unstable?"
2. Mental Balance. We observe and assess the person to be mentally stable or unstable.
3. Physical Balance. Is the person physically stable or physically unstable?
4. Spiritual Balance. Is the person spiritually stable or spiritually unstable?
Now when we come to spirituality, most people get confused and they say, "Well, doesn't that have to do with religion?" Well, not necessarily so. The term "spirituality" has to do with the inner-workings of things, the "behind the scenes" energy and activity within a person If we're talking about the term "religion", we're talking about methods set up, perhaps eons ago, in an effort to help a person to create a closer to relationship between themselves and what we call God.
It is key to look at the soul aspect of how we create things in our lives, and this involves a "Focus Point". What does it mean to have a "Focus Point"? What is the nature of a "Focus Point"?
As you start practicing the Power of Integrative Thinking, eventually you will be led to taking some sort of a physical action. Most people have a tendency to wait on things to happen or to wait for some kind of sign before taking a physical action. In truth, the action is already happening – you are physically "thinking" about it, aren't you? You have to be with the evolution of the though in partnership with your feelings and emotions as the physical action unfolds and identifies itself to you.
Most of us have had the feeling of being overwhelmed, especially if we are running or operating any kind of business. We feel we are doing too much, working too many hours, spending too much time on work-related activities. Based on what some psychologist have said, the truth of the matter is that feeling overwhelmed is really not about "overwhelm", but rather being caught up in the "anxiety of failure." It's the anxiety of failing that is really the key, not the notion of overwhelm. Consequently, we spend a great deal of time trying to "keep it together" because we fear failing or have a fear of loss.
I suggest that we can change our perspective when dealing with Overwhelm. We do this by formulating a pattern for our actions. For example, formulate a "mini-day" for a 3-day time period. Choose a day of the week and designate how your time will be spent throughout the day. You could design a "mini-day" as follows: I'll spend making calls for 2 hours, I'll work on work search for 1 hour, and the next hour I'll devote to study time. In other words, you put those things that need to be done within a designated time frame.
What we are saying here is you need to integrate aspects of the nitty gritty day to day with what it takes to accomplish the overall operation you are engaged in, whether it's dealing with an entrepreneurship, a business, an internet business, or dealing with a relationship. Look at and identify the Key Aspects of what is involved. Then from there formulate the system by which you will achieve your objectives.
There's another practice that will give you tremendous insight in helping with what we call the power of integrative thinking. It's what I call the Mood Graph. The Mood Graph really addresses how you experience the day-to-day things in your life, throughout the day. The Mood Graph is set up on a 30 or 31-day basis where you check mark the things about what's happening with you, in the morning time, in the noon time, and in the evening time. Throughout the day, our emotions, our mental perspective, our physical selves, and everything else changes throughout the day. The Mood Graph will help you to pinpoint or zero-in on exactly what's happening with you by check marking those things that happen throughout with day. Within three to four weeks the check marks on your graph will reveal to you your strengths and weaknesses with great specificity. You will then have the ability to apply your strengths or attend to your weaknesses appropriately. I believe you will find that the Mood Graph is a powerful technique. http://www.pathfinderinstitute.com/
So as you start to look at these things, and as you go further into the process, you will begin to identify, experience, and appreciate other ways that the Power of Integrative Thinking can be useful in your life.
And as always, in all things that you do, that you say, that you dream, You Gotta Have Heart.
Get the facts and do something about it - A Must hear!- "Sistas and Heart Disease" on Sumatra BlogTalkRadio - http://tobtr.com/s/881381
Book One: ”An Open Heart” of my trilogy, Passion Between the Sheets of Life, is now available as an eBook for purchase on my website: www.passionbetweenthesheetsoflife.com, the book is now also available in hardcover!
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