I have been blessed to live outside of the United States in my active duty time in the Navy: 3 years inJapan and 1 year in Africa. But my time in Africa was life-changing and eye-opening. I'd love to share what that time taught me about life and business: http://www.afipittman.com/2014/08/29/3-things-living-in-africa/. ;
LIFE (189)
As you look over your life and more than likely compare yourself to others
who share some commonality like age, culture or other do you speak
these words? I should have been further than this by now!
This is the wrong mindset. It is definitely not a success mindset and will sabotage your Authentic Breakthrough whether you’re a christian mom are in the category of christian women in business, christian women entrepreneurs, Author, Coach, Consultant, Speaker or other you must cultivate a positive mindset and let go of limiting beliefs.
Don’t continue to focus on woulda, coulda, shoulda beens… FOCUS on the right
here and right now manifestations. Yes! Death and life are in the POWER
of the tongue. As a man thinketh in his heart so is he. I set before
you death and life “choose life!” Focus on the positives. Focus on your
desired outcome. Focus on FAITH!! Focus on GOD!!
You see when you base your success on what you have accomplished based on time you are setting yourself up for self sabotage.
Your success is not based on your bank account, how many friends you have or
even how many customers or clients you have. You can’t even base it on
whether you own a house or have a husband.
Success must be defined by you and for we who are christians based on your walk with God.
We all have a purpose in this life and we live out our purposes.
To succeed according to another’s definition and miss your life calling is not success at all.
Change your focus and change your life!
I’d love to support you.
I invite you to join me for my EmpowerME One Day Online Event. – Go where
you’ve never gone before. Do what you’ve never done before. Tap into
God’s abundant living for you. Get the Keys, tactics, quick and easy
steps during this movement. Discover Authentic Mindset, Empowerment and Breakthrough Secrets. Click here to reserve your place.
A movement whose time has come. Go Get Your Breakthrough!
I’m here to support you..
PRESS Release - Sacramento, CA February 10, 2014
Go For More in 2014!
It’s a sad fact that 50% of resolutions are given up on by February. You can change that.Whether you’re at the beginning of the year or mid year you’ve got to have a plan and move away from traditional resolutions to intentions and commitments attached to effecting goal setting and achievement.
Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more. Tony Robbins
It all begins with a decision. God’s gift to you is life and what you do with it is your gift back to Him. Go for more in 2014!
“Before working with Robin in the Make it Happen 30 days of Empowerment Coaching program, I was looking for a coach that could provide some guidance and directions with the goals that I wanted to achieve. After working with Robin I got more clarity on how to break down my goals and focus on the areas that I could strengthen. Then I could identify the areas that I needed to work on more in depth and now I have more confidence in pursuing the goals that I have set for bringing my Vision to reality. Robin has a great positive attitude and knows how to work with her clients to help them achieve maximum results. Thanks for all you do Robin and may God continue to Bless you and the GREAT work you do.” Monique Spence
Whether you want to improve your finances, health, life, relationships, spiritual growth, business or other you owe it to yourself to set aside time to design, create and manifest your ultimate “authentic” lifestyle now!
Are you frustrated with your goal setting endeavors?
Are you dealing with broken focus?
Maybe you’re a Christian woman in business, coach, author or speaker with a great vision but don’t know where to begin with planning and/or how to market your business via online marketing or social media.
Whatever the case may be it’s important that you know that having an overall goal or clarity of vision is vital to success.
Is there really any benefit to setting goals?
Setting goals is a very significant part of success and positive accomplishments. People who set goals literally create a map of their target achievements in life, marking where they should begin, where to pause, where to delve a bit, and where and when to stop. Once this map is created, it allows the map drawer to check where he is in the scheme of things and whether or not he is making some achievements that will take him closer to his goals.
All great achievers have goals. You need to know exactly what you are working towards!
Robin Tramble has opened up Free Access to her Dreams Alive Now 30 Day Vision and goals Challenge. Get started here: http://bit.ly/1lZeDBc
About Robin Tramble International
Robin Tramble International is founded by Robin Tramble. Robin empowers busy Christian Women In Business, Entrepreneurs, Coaches, Speakers and Authors Who may be frustrated with the slow growth of their business and/or desire to manifest an Extraordinary mindset and healthy internal structure to get unstuck, focused and go BIG while prospering and making a difference in the world “authentically!”
Contact:
Robin Tramble
Robin Tramble International
Phone: 916.467.9139
RobinTrambleIntl@gmail.com
http://www.AuthenticLifeEmpowerment.com
Please stay connected so we can prosper together.
At your service, Rickey 623-453-6364
JMCC community http://www.jusmcc.net
Update on My Fun Life, mobile app company featuring travel app.
http://www.juniques.ws/myfunlife
This company is really growing daily by the hundreds.
There is a big interest in mobile apps and how to earn money providing them. Huge Discounts on Travel,Trips, and Condos will alway be of interest. My Fun Life is gaining international following.
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Attention readers of National Best Sellers.
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From guest blogger: Victoria Garrison
"A dream is a wish your heart makes..." These words represent the first lines of the popular Disney song from the movie Cinderella. They tell the story of how a dream turned a young woman from an indentured servant to a princess in what is easily one of the most well-known fairytales ever told. Ah, but I know what you're thinking: life isn't a fairytale. And the lyrics to that song are little more than just a catchy tune that replays in our heads and reminds us of childhood. Well, I'm not suggesting we all head outdoors to sing and dance with the birds and solicit help from the mice to complete our house chores. But I do wonder, how many people have given up on "the dream"? How many people no longer believe in the power of a dream, a wish, a prayer, or a hope? It's no wonder we lose our dreams; just watch the news for about ten minutes and you'll be halfway to depleted of all hope. But what if people stopped allowing outside influences to affect or dissuade their dreams? Imagine the overflow of purpose and drive that leads to the ultimate freedom of an abundant life!
It's safe to dream again. It's safe to open yourself up to the limitless possibilities of life, to make a wish in your heart, say a prayer in your spirit, lift up a vision for your life. It's safe! Drop your baggage, your past, and your skeptical outlook on life at the dumpster of a dissatisfied life. It's time-- now more than ever-- to take action on your dreams. Pick one, find one, develop one, or just keep one. A dream leads to a prayer, which leads to an answer, which leads to an action, which leads to a lesson, which leads to success, which leads to ABUNDANT LIFE, which leads to FREEDOM! To those of us who are willing to take that path....
Here's to the JOURNEY, Victoria
Dream again! http://www.garrisonprosperitysolutions.com
Photo taken from DebraWarren.com
I've learned many things over the years but one thing I always remember is never to chase money. If you choose to Chase Opportunities...Chase Experiences and Chase Your Passions, the money will follow. --JW
Earlier in January 2013 I became extremely depressed and had to disconnect and BE STILL for while to examine, re-discover, re-organize and re-energize my life. In the midst I was able to finally finish a book I've been writing for the past 6+ years. At times I didn't think I was worthy enough to even be writing on the subject matter but these past few months gave me new hope. When it finally appeared on amazon I could feel the noose of life around my neck literally loosen its grips. If you are interested it is now available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00BQ4M8S6. Download it, read it, then tell me what you think. Please leave a review on amazon and recommend to family, friends and anyone else if you believe it has helped you and can help others.
If you want forgiveness, you must first be forgiving. If you want understanding, you must first understand others. If you want to good people in your life, you must first be a sample of goodness. If you seek happiness, you must first find your peace. --JW
Hello Community, this is good information and I am glad to be able to share it.
Networking Increases NetWork
Posted by everybodysangel in Izania Blog ( www.izania.com)
FOLLOW THESE SIMPLE TIPS WHEN GOING TO HOSPITAL THEY WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE,
Having been ill with LUPUS 30 years and constantly being rushd to the hospital by ambulance...when i would get to the Hospital...I couldn't remembner all of the pertinent info they needed to help find out what was wrong with me.
SO THIS IS WHAT I DID AND YOU SHOULD TOO FOR YOURSELF OR ANYONE "CHRONICALLY ILL"... THAT YOU LOVE.
1. GET A LEGAL PAD AND BLACK MARKER.
2. ON YOUR FIRST PAGE WRITE YOUR: Name, Address/with 2ip code.
3. Write your home phone and cell phone numbers.
4. Your Birthdate and Age.
5. Your Social Security Number
6. YOUR INSURANCES...EVEN IF YOU ARE DYING...THEY WANT TO
KNOW WHO IS GOING TO PAY FOR THE HOSPITAL SERVICES!!!
7. WHO IS YOUR NEXT OF KIN AND THEIR CONTACT NUMBERS.
PAGE 2.
WRITE DOWN ALL OF THE CURRENT MEDICATIONS YOU ARE TAKING.
BE SURE TO LET THE NURSE KNOW IF YOU HAVE ANY ALLERGIES TO ANY MEDICATIONS.
Page 3. WRITE DOWN ALL OF YOUR CURRENT ILLNESSESS.
PAGE. 4. WRITE DOWN ALL OF ANY SURGERIES YOU HAVE HAD.
Page 5. WRITE DOWN ALL OF YOUR DOCTORS...THEIR OFFICE
NUMBER AND WHERE THEIR OFFICE IS LOCATED.
MAKE AT LEAST 10 COPIES. KEEP ONE IN YOUR CAR AND AT WORK IN YOUR DESK OR ANYWHERE YOU SPEND MOST OF THE TIME.
WHEN I GET IN THAT AMBULANCE...I TELL THE MEDIC...
"HERE BOO...THIS IS MY MEDICAL HISTORY! THEY SAY:
YOU ARE TOO COOL LADY! LOL
WHEN THE DOCTOR COMES IN I HAND HIM MY MEDICAL PACKAGE AND HE SADI IF ALL OF OUR PATIENTS DID THIS...DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY LIVES WOULD BE SAVED?
I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL DECEMBER 21, 2012 AND 2 LATINO MEDICS WERE WITH ME.
I PRAYED AND ASKED GOD IF HE WAS WITH ME...GIVE ME A SIGN.
SO THE MEDIC RIDING IN THE BACK WITH ME...SAID HIS NAME WAS ANGEL AND THE MEDIC"S NAME DRIVING THE AMBULANCE WAS NAMED JESUS.
I SAID YOU ARE LYING. BUT HE WAS TELLING THE TRUTH!
I LAUGHED SO HARD, AS WE KNOW THE LORD DOES HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR!.
WHEN I TOLD HIM I HAD PRAYED TO GOD FOR A SIGN...
HE SAID LADY...YOU GOT AN ANGEL IN THE BACK AND JESUS IS DRIVING...WHAT MORE SIGN DO YOU NEED GOD LOVES YOU!
BROTHERS AND SISTERS...THIS IS A TRUE STORY. (laughing)
GOD BLESS YOU ALL FOR 2013 AND DIDN'T OUR PRESIDENT AND FIRST LADY LOOK LIKE A KING AND QUEEN YETERDAY. THEIR DAUGHTERS ARE BEAUTIFUL AND WHEN THE BOYS START CHASING THEM...I THINK MR. PRESIDENT IS GOING TO START SMOKING AGAIN...(LAUGHING)
I LOVE YOU ALL...DEB SIMON...MEDIA BROADCASTER
I am so excited to share the first People Who Prosper Entrepreneur of 2013, Monique Muhammad. Her story is absolutely amazing and so moving. This woman has been through a lot but through it all has risen above it all. She is the owner of Code Pink Productions, a nonprofit that is committed to helping community through the development of youth, low-income parents and raising funds for medical research. Her interview tells it all. Enjoy reading about her journey to being a CEO.
1.Tell me your story. What were you doing before you started your own business?
I was working at the High School that I graduated from (Thornwood High School in South Holland, IL) as an In-School Suspension Supervisor, Substitute Algebra Teacher, Girls Basketball & Track Coach. While also working part-time in a Beauty Salon and having a home office Income Tax Preparation Business during income tax season. I also was a single foster parent to 2 girls 13 & 15 years old.
2. What made you want to start a business and what is your mission?
I became fed up with the politics that I was dealing with at the High School because I was so young, my Track team had received State Championships and my Basketball Team had made school and district history as being the first of the school and first Girls team of the district to make it down state so in my opinion a lot of why I was at the job had been done and even though I was there to help the children my spirit was being torn down by the system and it was no longer worth it. I had been there for 7 years, touched and helped many children and it was now time for me to put the businesses and skills that I had put in the background in the foreground. I opened my own Beauty Salon and took the Income Tax Preparation business to an outside office. My mission was to provide all the things I felt was missing in these two industries, which was reliable, quality and professional service with integrity.
I was tired of women getting mistreated in Beauty Salons by going to stylist who did not respect their time and their environment who felt that because they provided good styling it was okay to have women waiting in a salon 4 or more hours for service that shouldn’t take more than 2 hours. Getting serviced in atmospheres where many times they did not feel safe because the owners did not ensure their rules were enforced. The income tax preparation business was starting to be flooded with “Big Name” companies who could care less about the consumer they were only looking for customers they did not care if they were providing preparers who were knowledgeable and honest and they were charging sometimes 3 times the amount that I was providing the loans on the income tax payers own refund. I wanted to make sure that since I was also of this community I was treating my customer the way I wanted to be treated, I wanted to provide quality, educated, professional and ethical services at a fair price. I knew I may not reach millions quite as fast but I had my integrity and faith that I may crawl to get there but when I did arrive my conscience would be clear because I focused on ethics first before prosperity.
My Non-Profit organization was started at first to show that women could get along and accomplish something. It then took on a life of its own with my being a Breast Cancer Survivor, former educator and foster parent. Since I did not any longer work at the schools but knew how much I loved being an impact in the lives of young girls, I knew that this was also my passion. And since I did not want to go back into the school system I needed to do something to provide the same services to the girls as well as help as many low-income parents as I could. Being a foster parent I saw that many children were in the system because the parents didn’t have the tools or motivation to make a better life for themselves and their children. I feel that if you help the parent you help the child and if you happen to get to the child after the fact we must teach them that they are only a product of their circumstances if they choose to be and you can choose to complain about the hand you are dealt or play it the best way possible. I have always chosen to play mine the best way possible.
Being a Breast Cancer Survivor I felt it would only make sense for my organization to also do things to raise funds for Cancer research amongst other illnesses that have taken the lives of those loved ones of the people in our organization or health issues that they are currently dealing with. Some people are just blessed with that fighter spirit and some have to be taught how to find it within them and that is what Code Pink Productions, Inc and the ladies involved are committed to doing.
3. What inspires you? What keeps you motivated daily to keep growing your business?
The fact that this young Black woman, raised by a single mother in one of the worse neighborhoods on the south side of Chicago could have graduated from High School received a Bachelor's degree, Cosmetology License, become an adoptive parent of 2 girls then have a biological child at 31, become a single parent, become diagnosed with Breast Cancer at 32, mom diagnosed with Colon Cancer just 1 week later, both go through Chemotherapy & Radiation while being Self-Employed and raising 3 Children, lose my mother 6 years later, receive my Masters Degree in Accounting 1 year after that and am now raising a 10-year-old daughter and God continues to wake me up daily to continue what I plan to do.
This all inspires me because as I approached each thing I had faith that if God gave me the goal he would also provide me with what I needed to accomplish it. As long as I didn't give up on him or myself. I pray daily and ask him to continue to give me the strength to pursue my dreams and to wrap his arms around my businesses and keep them and me safe. Every idea I wake up with I act on and in doing that I continue to get confirmation that I am on the right path. I make sure that I take time for myself and my daughter to keep my mind and ideas fresh while always pushing 100% toward achieving my goals and building an empire that I can leave my daughter & granddaughter. That I am ensuring through their education that they are prepared to run and continue to grow in my absence.
4. Do you have a mentor? Who is it and why? Do you believe it's important to have one?
I had my mother up until age 39 because she has always been an entrepreneur just never accomplished all that I knew she could and now that she is gone I actually just make sure I watch and listen to Oprah's Life Class as well as all those successful African-Americans who are or have gained success in the way that I want. That is for the long-term and making sure that you help others as you help yourself. I always say you can tell if financial security is a Blessing or Curse by whether or not it brings out the Best or Worse in you. I know God has blessed me with a good heart and spirit I want that to continue on even once I gain the financial comfort I am striving for which is I why I listen to those who I feel have accomplished that in the same way. "What does it profit you to gain the Whole World and lose your Soul?" I believe is it important to have one because none of us know everything and for me having older people who I can gain knowledge based on experience is a factor that keeps me pushing.
5. What would you tell someone who wants to get involved in your line of business but doesn't know how to get started?
Well right now I am currently a Cosmetologist with a Salon Suite in Texas (The Yeshe' Salon), an Accountant with an Income Tax Prep business (JPTS Tax Pros), President of an Non-Profit Organization (Code Pink Productions, Inc.) and lastly just became a partner in a Luxury Virgin Human Hair line(Ziye' Luxury Human Hair Extensions). So with all that being said I would say have a passion for the things that you aspire to do. If you have a passion you will never give up and that eventually means the money will come. Passion also ensures that you will love the fight for achieving success in something that you are truly passionate about. Once the passion is there, do research, consult others in that industry and in business as a whole, never think you know it all because you can always learn from someone and once you know what it is you want to accomplish never give up until you do. I am just blessed to be passionate and talented in 3 areas and because of that I push to be successful in all of those areas. I know I may reach each one at a time but I know because I am passionate about them all success is guaranteed no matter how long it may take because the will and desire exist.
6. What advice would you give to someone with an entrepreneurial spirit?
Believe in yourself and your God gifted talent and desire He has given you, Once that is done you will know that you have the ability to accomplish any and everything you set out to accomplish as long as even when obstacles come in your way you know that they are nothing but Challenges for a Champion! How strong we are is determined by how much we had to go through or fight to achieve all that you set out to. I get discouraged often but I also know that with my life I was put here to allow my test to be testimonies to the strength that God blesses us with to survive and accomplish any and everything that we desire.
7. How can people get involved to help your non-profit?
By donating monetary amounts on our Facebook Page www.facebook.com/codepinkproductions email codepinkproductions@gmail.com and if you are in the Dallas area we are looking for professional women all professions or women with a story of turning tragedy into triumph to volunteer to help us with our mentoring programs for at risk girls, young girls and low-income single women. Monetary amounts will help us with many of our mentoring programs through sports, workshops and our annual Breast Cancer Research fundraiser in honor of myself and my mother.
Thank you Monique for sharing your story of faith, courage and success. Please support Monique’s nonprofit and Breast Cancer patients everywhere.
_____________________________________________________
Be someone’s motivation and tell us your story! To be featured on PeopleWhoProsper.com email Tamara@garrisonprosperitysolutions.com. Put PEOPLEWHOPROSPER in the subject line and share a little about yourself.
Yup! I quit Garrison Prosperity Solutions, Busy925.com, EVERYTHING! Ok. No not really but I have felt this way before. Haven't you? Maybe on your job, in your life or in business. You get that feeling of frustration, worthlessness or failure and just want to quit. Give up. Move on to something else or maybe even nothing at all. You get tired of kissing your boss' butt, of the incoming bills, mortgage payments or even trying to find customers and attract people to your company. It all just gets to be too much sometimes. I completely understand this feeling BUT the people that get through it are the ones that become inspiring success stories. I was even more reminded of this today from my Pastor who just so happens to also be my Father-in-Love.
In being the first Sunday of 2013, he preached on the subject of having a Fresh S.T.A.R.T.:
S- Stop making excuses - Excuses of being overwhelmed, sick, tired, having no money, working too much, working too hard, feeling like what you're doing is not enough or not generating results you want or expected, not knowing where to begin or how to move on. Stop the excuses.
T- Take inventory of your life - (This is my explanation) Create three lists:
- What in your life, job, business is working?
- What in your life, job, business is NOT working?
- What would you like to do differently or add to your life, job, or business?
After doing so, take the "NOT working list" and THROW IT AWAY! STOP DOING THE THINGS THAT ARE NOT PRODUCING THE RESULTS YOU WANT. Especially if you've been doing them for a while and they STILL aren't WORKING.
A- Act in faith - Take the "WORKING" and "TO DO DIFFERENTLY" list and start working on them. Keep doing the things that are working well for you. But for the things that you want to do differently, step out in faith and do them. Praying that the end result will be successful. Even if it is not, praying all will be done as it should be.
R- Re-focus your thoughts - Even though it is not the first of the year anymore, you can still make resolutions, or revamp your resolutions. Gather yourself and get back on track. FOCUS!
T- Trust God - PERIOD. He will make sure everything will go as it should.
Psalm 118:8 “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.”
Proverbs 3:5 “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.”
So sure, have your frustration, feelings of worthlessness and failure but don't quit and don't give up. Commit to a Fresh S.T.A.R.T., it will all be worth it!
Tamara Garrison-Thomas
http://www.garrisonprosperitysolutions.com
Black Girlz Talk
follow me on twitter @ blkgirlz & sdodson08
People Who Prosper is pleased to announce our new segment, A Day in the Life of... Series. In addition to featuring successful business persons, we will be featuring work-from-home business owners, chronicling a typical day in their life. This segment is to help those CURIOUS and perhaps INTERESTED in a career change.
Our first A Day in the Life of… feature entrepreneur is Shakirah Karim. She is a Seacret Agent by day..and by night. Shakirah is a successful distributor with Seacret Direct. Seacret Direct started about two years ago, branching off of their kiosks in malls. Shakirah and her partner Felipe have jumped right in and are steadily moving up the ranks. 007 couldn’t touch her as she rises to the top in this company. So, watch your back as you read A Day in the Life of…Shakirah Karim, Seacret Agent.
1. What do you do and how long have you been self-employed ?
My background is in public relations/Marketing and I'm currently a partner in a few small businesses. I've been self-employed as a network marketer for 6 years and for the past 2 years my main focus has been as a SEACRET Agent, an independent partner within the community of Seacret: an established retail brand now converted into a network business model.
2. How did you find your business and what made you decide to become self-employed?
I was introduced to SEACRET by a few close friends. They had been inspired by products and had come up with a new concept that would redefine the Seacret brand. They developed a system where instead of chasing people at the mall through high pressured kiosk sales, they could WOW them in the comforts of their own home. Today, with still less than 30,000 agents within the entire company (US, Canada, Mexico, South Korea) and more international capabilities there is so much more growth we're going to experience and those that take action and position themselves now while we're doing less than $5 million a month will be reaping the many rewards once we reach $100 million mark!
3. What are your daily success, productive, personal development and/or family routines? Explain a day in your life: Morning. Afternoon. Evening.
My daily routine consists of waking up, walking my dog, reading a few pages of the Bible. Then I spend 30-45 minutes doing personal development, I just finished reading Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude by Napolean Hill and I've just started reading The Leader Within by John C Maxwell. I try to make it to the gym at least 4 times in the week. I make sure I start my day off right and continue to working on myself inside and out. Creating good habits like these help you develop in business and in other areas of your life. The remainder of my day consists of a mixture of sharing the products with new people and helping new agents launch their business and helping them with their WOW parties. I work Seacret on a full-time basis so I will have 1-2 WOW parties a day. The majority of people who work with us are on a part-time basis, doing maybe 1 WOW party a week. I'm on a leadership hunt, we're less than 25,000 agents, the top money earners coming out of Seacret haven't even heard of this opportunity yet.
4. What are the biggest challenges in your business operations?
The biggest challenge that I face would have to be MINDSET. It's something that we all struggle with not only in business, in our faith, in our life. What's interesting, is it’s also the only thing we have control over. I can't control what others are going to do or not do. But I can control how I feel, how I react and what action I take. I continue to work on keeping a positive forward thinking mindset. For the first time I've found a passion and purpose in what I’m doing and I’m confident on where it will take me and my family. Never forgetting where I've come from, I'm focused on where I'm going and how many people I can take with me.
5. What keeps you motivated to work from home or stay self-employed and not get an everyday J.O.B.?
I'm motivated by the future of this company. Seacret was a $800 Million powerhouse and to be a part of that moving over to the relationship marketing space has been amazing. What motivates me is that fact that we have WOW products that shows results, it's sold in over 40 countries, and has only been open for less than 2 years. The timing of the company has made me want to work even harder. There's no other industry that can provide me unlimited income potential and time freedom. And with Seacret I've been able to help other people realize their goals and dreams as well, because it's not just what you do in your life but how many other people you can effect as well.
6. What advice would you give to someone looking to be self-employed?
What I love about this business is that it's meant to be built part-time. You should be working full-time on your job and part-time on your fortune (your business). I think self-employment is the key to freedom. Having a part-time home based business that pays can give the average person choices. If you find the right venture and follow a proven system that part-time business could do anything from cover the bills to pay for that vacation or even completely transform your life financially. Once the income from your part-time business outweighs your full-time income you have reached freedom. Then you are in a position to choose where you want to spend your time. When deciding to start/open a business do your research, find something that will give you exponential return. With respect to network marketing if you want to build true leverage invest in a venture where there's still an opportunity for growth and not in a company that has an already well established distribution. Mark Twain once said that success was simple: "Find out where everyone is going and then get there first."
Website: www.seacretdirect.com/deadsea
Email: kirahjoy@hotmail.com
________________________________________________________________________________
If you would be interested in being feature in our A Day in the Life of.... Series, please email Tamara@garrisonprosperitysolutions.com with a synopsis of your journey to working at home.
Desperate
I can’t control my emotions
Desperate
My heart beats fast, my breathing is erratic
Desperate
I am going to be sick, my body is shaking
Desperate
I cannot think straight
People react and do things when they feel desperate that they may not ever do in any other circumstance. People become desperate for different reasons. My husband became desperate due to his addiction. He was desperate to get his next hit. It didn’t matter what he did or if he hurt me. His drug induced paranoia and the altered state of mind he was in was his reality. I became desperate to be the person he needed me to be. I was desperate to save myself which made my life become an extension of his reality. I was desperate to save myself, him and our marriage.
Our life got so bizarre it is hard to believe that the things that happened; really happened. It is hard to remember the sequence and details of the events. I felt like I was living in a nightmare. I felt trapped and wanted to run, but I couldn’t because I was afraid of what would become of my house if I left. I had nowhere to go because I didn’t want to involve my children. I couldn’t get myself together enough to deal with things in a calm manner. I was Desperate…
I learned that if I hurt myself, it would stop him from hurting me. He would be concerned about me enough that he would quit yelling and threatening me. I was desperate to protect myself from him and I decided I would not let him hurt me again. Somehow hurting myself was easier to deal with than being hurt by him. The first incident was when he saw a bruise on my leg and started accusing me of cheating on him. He wouldn’t stop and I was feeling overwhelmed and afraid. I ran to the kitchen and said ‘you want to see marks on my legs…’ and I started to stab myself until blood started spraying everywhere. He calmed down and didn’t hurt me. When I felt trapped, I would run out the door to get away. This would get him so mad because he said I was causing a scene. I would be afraid to go home because I knew he would hit me so instead I ran to the main street and jumped in front of a truck, hoping this would take me away from the pain forever. There were other variations of what I did out of desperation. I stabbed myself in my thigh and tried to stab myself in my chest. I cut my wrists both horizontally and vertically; one cut was 5-6 inches long. I tried to take multiple pills so I could sleep and never wake up again. I couldn’t live like this anymore and yet I had to try to find ways to live through it.
My life was no longer mine. My life revolved around his drug use. I no longer felt like a loved wife. He was setting himself up in single sites on a regular basis. He would not stop associating with other females or his “drug friends”. He was stealing money on a regular basis. He was hitting me more and more and the verbal and emotional abuse was daily. Nothing I did was right and I wanted to die. My life consisted of living from day-to-day not knowing what to expect. Every day was a challenge because everything revolved around his addiction and his reactions.
I do have to give him credit for one huge thing that he did. During this time, one of my daughters was pregnant. Every time I hurt myself or tried to kill myself he reminded me about my new grand-daughter and that she needed to know me. Thoughts of my new grand-daughter are what kept me alive. If not for her, I know I would not be alive today.
My ultimate act of desperation came and I cannot ever explain how guilty I feel. The guilt will weigh my heart for years to come.
As I became more and more afraid, as I felt I had no alternative, my mind changed. I no longer cared what happened to my house or my possessions. I started planning my escape, praying I could last until I was able to get away. There were still times when I felt like killing myself was my only escape. My daughter went into labor…now was the time. I went to be with her in the hospital, and did not return home. We talked at length and he continued to say he needed me home and that he wanted help. He seemed sincere and that is all I wanted was for him to get help. I went out-of-town and he said he was going to check himself into a rehab. While I was gone I called him and he did not answer then I found out that he had another woman in our house. I believe this woman was his drug dealer. He lied to me about it and that was the final straw for me so I had him served with a restraining order that I already had in place….”just in case”. I don’t’ know why this incident was any worse than any other incident, however something inside of me snapped. I knew that I had to do something or either he or I would soon be dead. My mind told me that he knew no one and therefore had nowhere to go; he would be forced to go to rehab. After all he said he wanted to go so this should help him to actually take the step needed. I always promised him I would not call the police….my guilt was so bad because I went back on a promise…that is something I try not to ever do.
I felt guilty…I felt confused…All I wanted was for him to get help so we could fix our marriage.
A couple of hours later he returned to our house. He jumped through our sliding glass door, obviously high. What happed next is unclear. I don’t remember all of the details. My doctors said I probably blocked it out and may not ever remember. I remember parts and I know the outcome…
His ultimate act of desperation … I do not know what he was thinking… I may never know…
I remember screaming when I heard the explosion of him jumping through the glass. My scream must have been so intense that it caused my neighbors to call the police. I know that he kept asking me why I did what I did. He took me to our room and tied my legs together. He later told me it was so we could talk…so I wouldn’t run like I always do. I remember the phone ringing a couple of times and screaming into the phone when I picked it up. He grabbed the phone from me, tore it out of the wall and threw it. I believe it was the second time I screamed that the police kicked in my door because they heard me. I remember being scared to death as the police said to come out or they would shoot. I couldn’t untie my legs and I knew they were going to kill me. I remember the police trying to tell me that my husband did certain things to me and I would not say that he did because I didn’t know or remember. They tried to say he attacked me with my daughter’s taekwondo weapons. When I told them he did not, they became angry. I refused to talk to them because they would not listen. My daughter took me to the hospital and found that I had a broken jaw and my ear was cut to the point the cartilage was exposed; I had it glued back together. The back of my head was totally bruised and I do not know how any of this happened. When I told his sister what happened she said I was stupid if I thought anything other than he was going to kill me. She said she knew him better than anyone and that was his intentions. Everyone told me things I did not want to hear, everyone said things about my husband that they believed…no one understood that he needed help…no one understood that I was not mad. I was desperate to save our marriage he was desperate for me to understand his problem…
We were both desperate for our fairytale to come true…
He had a problem just like I did…
The things we do out of desperation
Are our reality, at the time.
The things we do out of desperations
Are the only options at the time.
The things we do out of desperation
Can change our lives forever.
Empty
I cannot think
Empty
I have no feelings
Empty
My heart is gone
My husband went to prison. Many people would say: “Good that is what he deserves”, however that is not the way I look at it. When people hear my story, many gasp and say “oh my gosh”, however that is not the response I needed.
After my husband was arrested, I fell into the deepest depression I have ever felt. I didn’t know things could get worse in my mind. I didn’t know there could be a new level of giving up on my life. To say I felt like a failure or to say I couldn’t think straight or to try to express my feelings in any way, would not express the depression I was in. I lost over 40 lbs. I couldn’t eat; I couldn’t sleep. It took every bit of energy I had to be able to talk to anyone because I just wanted to be alone. I tried to be the person everyone expected me to be and that only caused me to feel worse. Everyone wanted me to hate my husband, they wanted me to not ever forgive him or even talk to him again. I couldn’t do that. Remember, the one thing I have always liked about myself is that I am “too nice”. I don’t judge and I don’t get mad at anyone. I hated myself for causing my husband pain. I hated myself for causing my children pain. I hated myself for causing my parents pain. I hated myself for all the decisions I had made that affected everyone’s life in a negative way. In order to heal, I had to get back to being me because if I couldn’t like myself, I could not ever move forward.
I was afraid to be in my house alone. The quiet would ring in my ears and no matter how I tried to stop it, it wouldn’t go away. I found myself pacing the floors and breaking down for what appeared to be no reason. First my heart would start beating so fast it hurt; then I would feel sick to my stomach and my body would feel hot and flushed; then my head would feel like it was going to explode. I would start to hyperventilate and feel like passing out. My emotions were uncontrollable, I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t concentrate on anything; even when I realized my mind was drifting, I could not control where it went. If only I could make my mind not remember. If only I could replace the memories with something good. I struggled within my mind because I couldn’t figure out if I was afraid to be home because of the events that had taken place or because of being alone. All I knew is my heart would start to pound as soon as I got in the house. The harder I tried the worse I felt and the deeper my depression became. I was always the person that handled all problems and made sure everyone was okay, why couldn’t I handle this? What was wrong with me? Was I losing my mind? I am not a stupid person, why couldn’t I control my thoughts? Why couldn’t I figure out what was right and what was wrong? My mind would tell me I should be a certain way and my heart would tell me something different. All I could think of was going to sleep and never waking up. My life was now consumed with two main thoughts; 1st to find a way to pay my bills, pay for my funeral and have everything in order so my husband and children would not have to deal with anything after I was gone; 2nd to be sure my youngest daughter was okay since she was the only child not living on her own I needed to know she would be okay when I was gone. I tried to tell myself that my being gone would cause my family even more pain…if I could convince myself of this maybe I could stop thinking of dying. I couldn’t’...I couldn't convince myself because all I could see is the hurt everyone was feeling and it was all my fault. I felt like I was a bad person and that I was being selfish because I didn’t want to be mad, I wanted to forgive, I wanted to find a way to work things out…my wants were causing others pain and again my mind told me that everyone would be better off without me. The struggle going on within myself was taking over my life. It is a feeling I cannot describe…to be sad would have been a happy state of mind compared to what I was feeling. I just wanted to feel peace….why couldn’t I feel peace?
I went to a doctor for help and was put on some sort of anti-depressants. They took the edge off, however it didn’t take long for me to realize I felt like a zombie with no feelings at all. Which is worse…no emotions or extreme emotions? I went to counseling groups to try to understand my feelings. I couldn’t find support for the feelings I was experiencing because of the different levels of my depression. Groups that dealt with abuse, told me to be strong and to prepare myself. They focused on how to protect myself. Groups that dealt with addiction, told me to distance myself from the problem and to not take responsibility for “his” problem. Individuals that I tried to talk to, told me to not believe in my husband and to get away from him. No one seemed to understand the core of my depression. It was not the abuse or the addictions it was the struggle within myself. Nothing helped….it only made me feel worse. I felt like my mind was going to explode. I couldn’t think straight because everything in my mind conflicted with my heart.
I guess I can admit that my depression was due to my husband’s actions. However, it is not due to the things he did. It is because of his actions, I was forced into a struggle within myself because of my inner most feelings and beliefs. There is no way to express what I felt like, there is no way to explain the thought process I was struggling with because to say the words out loud would mean I would have to live with what others thought of me. I would be labeled as “stupid” or “naive” or even “weird” and “not normal”.
Everyone thought they understood my depression, they even said it was “normal after what I had gone through.” Everyone knew what was best for me…However no one knew who I was. I was/am not a person who holds a grudge or who judges. I was/am not a person who thinks negatively about situations. I was depressed because I felt guilty for causing pain to everyone. I was depressed because I couldn’t express myself without being judged or labeled negatively. I was depressed because I felt like I was causing separation between my family, because of my beliefs. I was depressed because no one understood that I loved my husband and all I wanted was for him to get better so we could resume our life together. I was depressed because I couldn’t be me…I had to not get upset if they talked bad about my husband…I had to act as if I was ready to end my marriage…I had to pretend to be someone that I was not.
I made a commitment to my husband till death do us part. I made a promise to God that I would do everything in my power to honor my marriage. I believe in forgiveness. There is a difference between forgiving someone and knowing the things they did were wrong. It is not my place to judge the things that happened. It is my place to forgive as I would want God to forgive me for the wrong things I have done.
If I cannot live according to God’s will
I would rather not live on this earth
Reflections
Is Love Blind
Or do we choose to see only what we want
I can see clearly now
We all have to look in the mirror to see ourselves. Sometimes we do not see what others see. We see what we believe about ourselves not necessarily what is real. Sometimes we see what our mind tells us and sometimes we see what our heart tells us; our self-image may be a mixture of both.
The story I have told is very 'one-sided' in many ways. It tells of the hurt I felt. This hurt was real to me, however it does not tell of the hurt I caused that was just as real to my husband. When I face my judgment day, I will have to account for every word I spoke and ever thing I did. I have to reflect on me because this is the only way I can heal.
When I look back I cannot believe some of the things I did. This was not me. I say that, I believe this, and I know it to be true; so why can't I accept the same from my husband? Why can't I accept that the things he did were not who he really is? I must accept this just as I ask him to accept me for who I am...who I truly am even through the things I did.
I yelled and I cursed.....oh how I yelled. I said hateful and hurtful things. I was selfish and controlling. At the time, I would have argued each of these admissions. At the time, I would have believed I was doing the right thing. I know now that I caused my husband to hurt in many ways also. I must admit my faults. The first is that I did not respect him as my husband; I did things that belittled him. I had been a single mom for 20 years and had only my son to turn to. This became a habit for me and I didn’t realize the hurt it caused my husband. If there was something to be done; I would instantly say “let me ask (my son)” I should not have done this, I should have asked and accepted my husband’s word and opinion. Another variation of this is that he would say something and I would not acknowledge that he said it until I heard the same thing from someone else. By doing this I made him feel like I was not listening and I didn’t put any importance to what he said; it made him feel like I cared what others thought or said more than what he thought or said. I should have known this because I felt the same way. I have a very bad habit of talking…and talking…and talking…This caused many pains. First it made my husband feel like I was treating him like a child. It is not uncommon for me to say something several different ways and many times over. I did not mean to make him feel like a child, this is something I really need to work on because not only did this cause my husband pain; I was also causing some of my own pain. My husband would tend to “tune me out” after a while or after my story was repeating and this would make me feel like he was not listening or like he didn’t care what I had to say when in reality I was saying the same things over and over again.
The next fault of mine is that I was very controlling. I had to have everything my way because if I controlled the way things were, I would be sure they were done correctly. I was so used to doing everything for myself and my children. In my mind I had to do everything to be sure all was taken care of; I had to be sure all problems were solved. Because of my mind set, I took charge in every situation and did not allow my husband to be the “man of the family”. My mind had convinced me that I was taking care of him. I would nag about everything; thinking that I was just making sure everything was getting done. The Bible says it is Better to live out in the desert than with a nagging, complaining wife. Proverbs 21:19 & Proverbs 27:15 says An endless dripping on a rainy day and a nagging wife are alike. This was me and I had no idea I was hurting him and I was not acting like his wife. I was being a mom like I have always been. He didn’t need a mom he needed a wife.
One of the faults that I hate about myself the most is in the things that came out of my mouth. It is still hard for me to believe that I cursed the way I did. I had not ever cursed like this before in my life. I not only cursed, I said some very hurtful and hateful things. I told my husband he was a crack-head whore, I told my husband that I hated him. There is no way for me to say I am sorry for the words that came out of my mouth.
The guilt I feel for the ugly words I said and the way I acted will haunt me forever….who am I to complain about the names he called me when I did the same to him? Who am I to judge him when I will have to stand before God for the things I did to him?
Stop … Think … Reflect
Only God can judge
We are all unique in the way God made us
Stop and see who you are before you judge others
Think and Thank God for all of our differences
No one is perfect … we all have faults
Reflect and look inside yourself
Addict, Addiction, Addicted
Ugly words
Misunderstood words
Words of Judgment
Words of disgrace
My husband’s drug addiction…is that what ruined my life? I am not even sure I can say that is true, because I have to be honest and I believe there are a lot of addictions that harm us in different ways. We all have addictions of some type; sometimes we call them habits. We may be addicted to exercise or coffee or gambling or so many other things. It is when our addictions are not in balance that our life can be thrown off. I had several addictions. My addictions were to be loved, to be accepted, and to be wanted. I would do anything to try to achieve those addictions. My addictions also played a part in the craziness of what I am about to tell you.
Two definitions I found, online, are:
- To cause to become physiologically or psychologically dependent on a habit-forming substance
- To occupy (oneself) with or involve (oneself) in something habitually or compulsively; to devote or surrender (oneself) to something habitually or obsessively
To say that my life got crazy or bizarre would not express the true craziness. This was a life I knew nothing of. I was not prepared. It took me a while to even know what was happening. I was so naïve to drugs that again…I did not see the signs. There is a world known to drug addicts that I never knew existed. There is a code amongst addicts that I couldn’t understand. My life would soon become his, in part, due to my own addiction. “To occupy oneself with or involve oneself in something habitually or compulsively”…wow… that describes me exactly. I was addicted to wanting to be loved…I was addicted to wanting to fit in…I was addicted to needing to be needed. We both did things………maybe due to our addictions.
I lied to my family to protect my husband. I became more and more distant from my family because I didn’t want them to see the truth. After all, he was the man that loved me…right? I became a person I had not ever been. I yelled and I cursed at my husband. I hated the person I was turning into and yet I couldn’t stop doing what I was doing. I didn’t know that by doing these things, I belittled him. I was trying to get him to see things my way and I couldn’t understand why/how he could be treating me the way he was. I wanted so much to have the “perfect marriage” without realizing that I was contributing to my own problems.
His crack addiction led him to do things that I am not sure he would have otherwise done. I say I am not sure, because to this day, I do not know if they were drug induced actions or if these things are a part of who he is. I know he lied to me all the time. He convinced me that he needed my 401K savings to go home and invest in a business deal to help us. I believed him because he talked to “his people” on the phone and it sounded real. He lost all the money. I do know that he stole money from me on a regular basis in order to support his need. First it was $50 at a time then it was hundreds at a time. I couldn’t question him because if I did, I would spark his rage. He would take my debit card from my purse and get money before I even realized it was missing. Once I realized what he did, I started sleeping with my purse next to me or I tried hiding my card. He always seemed to find it and the times when he didn’t he found my checks and wrote checks out to himself signing my name. My money was disappearing and I wasn’t able to pay my bills. I know that he kept in contact with people that I would rather not have in my life and that at least one was a female. This certain female would text my husband every morning and I would be furious each morning. That was the way our day would begin. I know he visited porn and single sites on a regular basis. I would find flirtatious messages some of which were very graphic and inappropriate. Again, this would trigger my anger to a point I couldn’t control the things that came out of my mouth. I know he stole all of my valuable jewelry and many household items; my diamonds and pearls were gone; our flat screen T.V. was gone; I would be looking for something random and find it was gone, things that had great sentimental value to me where just all of a sudden gone. All taken, in order to pay for his addiction. When I asked him, of course, he said he didn’t do it. He swore to me that he would not ever steal from me and yet so many things were mysteriously gone… One of the other traits of his addiction, that I finally learned, is that he would lose track of time. He once left the keys in the car with the car running; he left candles burning till they burned all the way down and melting all over everything. He would swear that he had the best memory. I felt like I had to bring things to his attention when those things could put us in some type of danger, but I soon found it was easier to just let the little things go. There were enough bigger things that got me so upset, I couldn’t seem to let them go. There were several times when he would forget to pick me up from work. One time in particular, he said he was going to get gas, instead he went to the bank…took out money…went out of town and left me to walk 5 miles home from work. He didn’t get home until the following day, with no explanation except that somehow it was due to something I said or did. His addiction was combined with ongoing abuse to cause another level of craziness. If I didn’t give him the bank card, I didn’t trust him. If I questioned his whereabouts, I treated him like a child. If I got upset about his cheating, I must be guilty of cheating. The drug addiction along with the abuse, meant I was being hit on a regular basis and I never knew what I did to deserve it other than the reasons he told me which didn’t seem real in my mind or were just plain not true.
When I learned of his addiction, I was finally able to see the cycle. It was usually a three (3) day cycle. He might be able to stay clean for a couple of days, however by the third day he was craving so bad and that is when he would be violent and extremely mean to me. Although I learned the cycle, I did not learn to keep my mouth shut and that is usually the reason I would get hit. Somehow, I still believed I could reason with him. I believed this because there were some days when he truly seemed loving and believable. He would tell me that he wanted help and that he needed me to help him. He would tell me that without me he couldn’t do it. I soon found out these were only words. He was so good at saying the right thing. He always knew how to convince me. I didn’t know this was another characteristic of a drug addict. He was in his own world and there was no reasoning with him. Many of the incidents I described happened before I ever knew he had an addiction and therefore I struggled even more because I thought it was all because of me.
My addiction to him also helped in making me believe in him. After all, he was my “fairytale husband”. If only I could get him to see…If only I could get him to understand…
If Only…
If is such a big word for being so small
It carries so much meaning that may not ever be
If
Hurt #6
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails
The Bible tells me what love is…this is what I believe
My mind is a cloud. I don’t remember the specific details of each hit. I do remember the types of things that would cause them. I remember the bruises, the headaches, and the heartaches. I remember the lies I had to tell in order to hide what had been done to me. I remember feeling desperate. I remember feelings like I didn’t want to live any more.
It could have been because I looked at someone when I left work and smiled as I said bye; that meant I was cheating on him. He would question me and if I said no, he would call me a damn liar and back up his words with a punch.
It could have been because I stood behind him while in a meeting, that meant I was trying to hide so I could flirt and again I would pay for it when we were alone.
It could have been because I got a call on my cell phone that was the wrong number, and that meant I had a secret code to meet someone; again a reason to hit me.
Most of the incidents were because he thought I was cheating on him or lying to him. At first I thought it was romantic that he was jealous. After all, I had never experienced a kind of love where someone actually loved me enough to care what I did. My thoughts of romance were soon replaced with thoughts of death. There was one incident when he threw a dog bone at me and hit me in the head. My head cut open and started to bleed. There was another time he kicked me in the stomach. Another punch was to my eye, which caused my contact to cut my eye. Usually it was a punch. I say a punch because that is what it felt like to me however, there were many times when he said he “barely tapped me”. Those “taps” always seemed to leave bruises on my body. One incident left me with a black eye and the white of my eye was so filled with blood that I had to wear an eye patch to work. I am sure no one believed the lies I told about the patch after all the bruises they had seen on me. I tried to cover the bruises with make-up, I am sure people saw through my attempted cover up.
I was in an abusive relationship before and I always said I would not ever allow this to happen to me again. When you are in the middle of an abusive relationship, you cannot think straight. You are too busy thinking about you next move and how you are going to survive from one day to the next.
There is not much more to say about this. It is what it is. As much as the physical abuse may have hurt me and as bad as the descriptions may seem, they were actually nothing compared to the mental/emotional abuse. The physical affects would eventually heal however, the mental/emotional scars could last a lifetime.
Through the beginning phases of this abuse, I still had no idea my husband was addicted to crack. Maybe if I would have known, some of these things may not have occurred. Maybe, I would have been able to understand the hurt he was feeling that caused him to react the way he did. Maybe I would have been able to look at him differently and therefore see myself in a different way. Maybe I wouldn’t believe that I deserved what I got because he was the person with the problem not me. Maybe….just maybe….
Love is not supposed to supposed to hurt....
Learn 48 different lessons for accomplishing any goal that you desire and to help create your future life. Juniques Multi Cultural Connections www.jusmcc.net endorse this video
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As posted on Denene Millner's "My Brown Baby" on November 5, 2012. See full post here.
Author: Akilah S. Richards
How is it that, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor and Statistics, our percentage of business ownership as black women in the U.S. is up 59 percent since 2002, yet we make up a mere 3 percent of the $1.2 billion dollars in sales from women-owned businesses?
Unjust systems and long-standing, deliberately placed hurdles aside, many of us are learning to maneuver this new era of social impact through technology, and leveraging our skills with our passions to the tune of thriving businesses and comfortable lifestyles.
But on the real, the numbers of us who hoist sails on sinking ships with unstable businesses far surpass the number of financially and emotionally stable black women business owners.
Certainly, we do not lack access to the resources or the brainpower it takes to excel in business—so what’s the deal?
Business and Life Strategist Katrina M. Harrell and I have got a theory about these troubling truths. It might ruffle your feathers a bit, but perhaps that’s a necessary part of your growth and ours.
The theory: Black women in business have been B.I.T.C.H.ing up, big time!
Yes, we BITCH up! We get scared. We stop trusting ourselves. We take the shortcuts and we prioritize popularity over business ownership. Many of us, myself included, spent years building a “popular brand”, without focusing on operating a business.
The results: High visibility, but low income. Some success, but no real fulfillment.
I was a slave to the very thing I had built. But thankfully, I got free.
READ MORE HERE...POWERFUL READ.
